HP 17.3" Dual-Core Laptop

by wootbot

Into the 8th Dimension

Don't believe the hysterical myths about Windows 8. It doesn't actually force you to read your emails as animated GIFs.

When the public is gripped by panic, those who profit are those who keep their heads. So while Joe Techshopper screams with terror and rage about the supposed shortcomings of Windows 8, you can swoop in and nab this sweet HP laptop for about one-fifth the cost of a MacBook.

You'll enjoy a 500GB hard drive, 4GB of DDR3 memory, USB 3.0 connectivity, and a 17.3" HD display - all because you looked beyond the paranoia and found out the truth about Windows 8:

  • Windows 8's user interface is not based on nonverbal grunts and moans.
  • Windows 8 does not attempt to sense your mood and show you only those apps it thinks are best for where your head's at right now.
  • Windows 8 will not convert all your photos into a single "memory sphere" accessible only in extradimensional "fractured space".
  • Windows 8 does not require users to specify their preferences down to the molecular level.
  • Windows 8 cannot steal your breath while you are sleeping.
  • Windows 8 will not report unenthusiastic user behavior to a central Bureau of Delight Compliance.