Every week in this space, we’ll take a look at the news and offer our own incisive blend of commentary, analysis, and poop jokes. The news you need, from a voice you can trust, in the 90 seconds you have to spare: that’s Woot Weads the Wire.
CHICAGO (UPI) -- A boy flying alone from San Francisco to Canada missed a connecting flight in Chicago because airline workers apparently forgot about him, his family said.
As an apology, the airline allowed the boy to purchase his $4 bag of chips at a special one-time-only reduced price.
BILOXI, Miss. (UPI) -- Jay Leno has been booked to perform a benefit for Mississippians impacted by the Gulf of Mexico oil spill, the Beau Rivage Resort & Casino said Thursday.
Leno has been scheduled just before current BP CEO Tony Hayward, leading experts to believe that Hayward will soon be losing his job.
NEW YORK (UPI) -- A growing number of nightmare sufferers are turning to a controversial treatment called scripting or dream mastery, scientists say.
Others are buying little tops and listening to Edith Piaf.
DETROIT (UPI) -- Officials in Detroit say they worry that television police shows using the city as a backdrop may lead to negative perceptions about Detroit and its residents.
Officials added that if the portrayals don't stop soon, they'd have everyone involved beaten to death.
VATICAN CITY (UPI) -- The Vatican has started using souvenir coins bearing the image of the Pope to make change at grocery stores and the gas station, officials said.
Locals reportedly can't stop giggling when tourists ask if they can touch their Pope's head.
WASHINGTON (UPI) -- The Venezuelan military shouldn't be on alert because of any concerns about U.S. action, a spokesman for the U.S. State Department said.
The spokesperson said the U.S. was only planning to crush all vuvuzelas, and somehow that got all twisted around.
