Tomorrow, March Madness. The competition will be fierce, and people will get frustrated - maybe because of a burst bracket, maybe because of a close loss, or maybe just because the games are all happening during the workday and not everyone has a cool boss. At any rate, there will be anger everywhere - and the Woot blog will be no exception! Because we'll be holding our own little seeded competition - March Angriness - to see just what infuriates people the most!
Using the Big Dance as our model, we've set up 4 Regions representing the areas of life that annoy us - Technology/Internet, Pop Culture, Politics, and Etiquette. For each Enraged Region, we, the selection committee, have chosen and ranked 16 things that makes our blood boil. These 16 things will be paired off tournament style (#1 plays #16, #2 plays #15, #3 plays #14, etc).
For each match-up, you will vote for whichever one makes you the angriest. The votes will then be tallied, and the winner will move on to the next round.
Here is the complete list of competitors by region:
Technology/Internet
- Forum trolls
- New iThing announced the day after the returns window closes
- Guess what?! FACEBOOK LOOKS DIFFERENT NOW!
- 99% of Torrent, no seeds
- "Your internet service will cost $3/month for the first five months, $46/month for the next three months, and then just $2,129/month from thereon out!"
- Your Apple product breaks; fanboys unable to believe Apple is at fault
- They said they'd be here to set-up my service between 9 and noon. They showed up at 2:30.
- I'm not great at this shooter, and I just accidentally stumbled into a room of experts. Ugh!
- Some dumb noob just stumbled into our room, and he ended up on my team. Ugh!
- How texting and tweeting are destroying the way we communicate
- The CGI zombies in this movie look like crap
- "You just lost a follower" tweets
- Your mom's on the phone. She needs help with the computer again.
- Smarmy old guys making statements about how texting and tweeting are destroying the way we communicate
- Seriously, it should not be this hard to find a cheap digital camera with a viewfinder!
- EA's Origin Software
Politics
- Pundits/political talk shows
- "I get all my news from this sketchy, Angel-fire-looking site catering specifically to people of my political stance."
- "That doesn't fit with how I look at things, so it's probably just made up."
- "You should get your news from a real source like Fox or CNN before watching the Daily Show!"
- People who think the Onion is real
- Political figure makes terrible, derogatory statement about a group of people, followed by, "No, you guys, some of my BEST FRIENDS are from that group of people."
- Girl/guy you're flirting with at a party turns out to be extremist psychopath
- "I spent a few hours making this meme just to show you how little your efforts matter."
- "I SPEND ALL MY TIME LOOKING FOR THINGS THAT WILL OFFEND ME!"
- When the opinions flare up at Thanksgiving
- Those stories candidates tell during debates that go, "I was in Ohio/Michigan last month, where I met a man/woman, whose situation conveniently exemplifies why my policy works best."
- Headline with words like "Scandal" and "disgrace"; article is about very minor issue
- The phrase "my tax dollars"
- "The other side's done the same/worse, which makes what my side did totally excusable!"
- The blunt, punch-in-the-face symbolism in poltical cartoons
- People who don't vote
Etiquette
- People who don't tip
- Guy in the traffic jam laying on his horn
- Boss giving you vital work to do at 4:45 on Friday
- Unapologetic owners of evil dogs/cats
- "I'm going to talk loudly on my cell phone this whole bus ride!"
- The person who corrects everyone's grammar
- "Look, I didn't bring my four kids to this coffee shop because I wanted to supervise them, okay?"
- The guy who never uses his blinker
- The guy who leaves his blinker on
- "And this is when I not-so-tactfully bring the conversation back to me."
- Person who gets the last cup of coffee in the break room and doesn't make more
- People who take the elevator to the second floor
- "I'm the stranger that stops you when you're out walking so I can talk to your dog in my baby voice."
- Your friend will NOT stop talking about inappropriate things in this crowded restaurant
- Check-writer in the grocery store express lane
- People who don't thank you for holding the door
Pop Culture
- Scientology
- Gritty comic book reboots
- The Transformers movies
- Pitchfork
- Rednecksploitation reality TV
- "Nobody's made any good music since year X, and I should know! I listen to the radio!"
- The fact that Tucker Max even exists, let alone is famous
- Crappy film adaptation of your favorite book
- "Book was better" purists
- Interview with your favorite musician reveals he's a pretentious moron
- The portrayal of women in romantic comedies
- "I'm posting this status to let everyone know that I care less about that movie/show/sporting event than anyone else."
- Commercials where people do the Cabage Patch
- Posthumous commercialization of Dr. Seuss
- "I like all music, except for country/rap."
- Is that your favorite celebrity's voice in a Kia commercial??
Have any questions? Concerns? Want to voice your support? Be our guest and post in the comments section below. The first set of match-ups (Technology/Internet Region) will be launched at midnight, so get your voting fingers ready!
And remember, don't get mad! Get angry!
Photo by flickr user, bottled_void used under a Creative Commons License.