I love you, Woot, but I have a confession.
I'm... a little tired of televisions, monitors, and vacuum cleaners.
My house is really, REALLY clean now and I'm very entertained watching my favorite shows on fourteen different HDTVs I've bought from you while I clean the floor all day with a dyson (that I've bought from you) in each hand, dodging the roombas (purchased, coincidentally, at one woot.com) that are darting around beneath my feet like stray kittens.
When the neigbhors start to complain about the noise from all the vacuuming, I play on one of the eighty-three new or refurb laptops stationed around the house that I've bought from you.
I miss two-for-tuesday, and I miss the small things. I miss the $4 memory cards, I miss the cheap little gadgets. It's the little things, Woot. My pocketbook is near empty and the electric bill from all of these devices is killing me. Sometimes, it's all I can do to bring myself to play with one of the eighteen boxes of buckyballs I've bought from you to fend off the sadness.
Woot... are you breaking up with me? Be honest. I know I'm not as well-off as I used to be. I spent it all buying heavily discounted - but still expensive - major consumer electronic devices from you, and now I can't keep up anymore. But you keep on selling them and I keep trying to buy what you're selling, but I just can't anymore. Is that the way you wanted it? Maybe you could've just, you know, talked to me a little, first. Good communication is key to a great relationship, and I'm feeling out of touch. Even your snarky, fun product information hasn't been able to cheer me up lately. I'd like to say it's not you, it's me - but is it, really? I'm feeling pushed away, Woot. Left behind. Is that the way you want it to be?
I'll be in my room, sobbing gently into a pile of random shirt.Woots, if you.. if you need anything from me, Woot. If you even want anything from me anymore.