Hello to be Woot!
I am writing with you to the greatest of SADness. Gravelly, the greet leader of the dearest republicof Kozikistan, Major.Framptal Moofi was savagely demancipated during a cellabration of the four year since Hormsburg massacre
According to records court, you, dearest Woot! are the Major,s nearest kin. Here in neighboring Kanduzi, where I am solicitor onbehalf of many, your benevolebt genorosity is legendgary - children far and wide know tales of your distribution of Borderline Official Champagnes for far less than retail value and how your lovely child, kids.woot presents presents to kneedy adult adolescents on a dailye basis.
We have taken it upon myself to save the vast enhairatence that general Moofi would have left to you for not the savage violence that has claimed his official hat.
Disfortyunately, I country is beneath great scrooting by the government of London, and to pay for Olympics, they levy great taxes on selfmoving money.
Thus, to outsmart they, I have purchased exactly three Boiling Oblong Crutons from your business endeavour.
If you would be sokind, dear Woot!, to include no fewers than one Bugatti Veyron in my Buttery Ostrich Compote, I will prmptly wire you all 40.000.000 flabe (equivalent to $1.300 US dollar) as "payment" to avoid any taxes on your vast enhieriteneces.We will put your generosite to specular use, to drive the captain of the Spinky Whompers, is local youth welfenclopper squad, to and from matches, resplendent in your grandeosity.
Bless be the soul of major Moofi! May he rest in piece.
Good wishes in you time of great morning.
I await you reply, Woot!
My wife swears I'm keeping Woot! in business all by myself. I think she may be onto something.