Wednesday, May 15

Stop The Disco Inferno Before It Starts: Woot Weads The Wire

by Scott Lydon 4 days ago

Every week in this space, we’ll take a look at the news and offer our own incisive blend of commentary, analysis, and poop jokes. The news you need, from a voice you can trust, in the 90 seconds you have to spare: that’s Woot Weads the Wire.

TOKYO (UPI) -- Mount Fuji has become visible more often from Tokyo than half a century ago, suggesting the air around the Japanese capital has become cleaner, a survey says.

Climate scientists say the study is still preliminary, though, as the sample size was only 36.

Monday, May 13

Music Monday: Songs About God

by Scott Lydon 6 days ago

Happy Music Monday! Today, Scott's chosen a topic many don't associate with popular music: songs about God. After all, there are as many different ways to worship as there are people, so why can't some rock stars get in on it too? Here's a classic to start us off:

George Harrison - My Sweet Lord

George had a reputation as the nicest Beatle, so it was pretty naturally he'd fall into religion. And, truthfully, the International Society for Krishna Consciousness has met with some controversy over the years. But the idea behind this simple love song is as pure as any Sunday hymn, and much prettier than many. Ultimately, this is just one guy using his gifts to thank his God for everything He has done. You might not agree with the specifics, but you can certainly understand the reasoning.

We've got four more after the jump, and last week's Spotify playlist as well. Then we want YOU to add some tunes! Please remember, we're happy to see songs about all faiths represented in the comments, but we don't want anyone acting like a jerk. It's about sharing great music together, not scoring theology points. Okay? Okay. See you inside…

Wednesday, May 08

But What About Their Sense Of Humor?: Woot Weads The Wire

by Scott Lydon 11 days ago

Every week in this space, we’ll take a look at the news and offer our own incisive blend of commentary, analysis, and poop jokes. The news you need, from a voice you can trust, in the 90 seconds you have to spare: that’s Woot Weads the Wire.

VATICAN CITY (UPI) -- The Vatican is now home to two popes, as Pope Francis welcomed his predecessor, retired Pope Benedict XVI, to the former pope's new residence, a spokesman said.

Insiders say Pope Benedict is his normal, super-tidy self, while Pope Francis is already leaving his vestments and hat on the floor. Will these two representatives of God's word ever find a way to live together?

Monday, May 06

Music Monday: Fun-kay

by Scott Lydon 13 days ago

Happy Music Monday! It's getting warm out, people are wearing less, and that's a good excuse to start havin' fun. We're gonna get funky today, and we invite you to join us.

Gap Band - Early In The Morning

The music is top notch, but even if it wasn't, you'd still have a good reason to love The Gap Band. What reason, you ask? THOSE HATS. Also of note is how The Gap Band made their song so impervious that even cover versions will remain substantially funky.

It's only gettin' funkier from here. See you after the jump.

Friday, May 03

Tetoris: One Woman's Odyssey

by Scott Lydon 16 days ago

Roughly 400 hours ago, forum mod Pemberducky took on a brave challenge: to let Flash game Tetoris run for as long as it could. Now, for maybe the first time in mankind's history, you'll be able to see a Tetoris game from start to finish.

HOUR ZERO: Pemberducky is talked into beginning her journey into madness. How bad could it be? she thinks as the first piece drops. Little does she know, this empty slate is about to become her prison… for over two weeks straight.

More after the jump…

Wednesday, May 01

His Neighbor Only Got A Porsche: Woot Weads The Wire

wire

by Scott Lydon 18 days ago

Every week in this space, we’ll take a look at the news and offer our own incisive blend of commentary, analysis, and poop jokes. The news you need, from a voice you can trust, in the 90 seconds you have to spare: that’s Woot Weads the Wire.

JERUSALEM, April 28 (UPI) -- Israeli officials asked people to refrain from lighting bonfires on a Jewish holiday Sunday because of an unusual number of recent wildfires.

Those who encounter burning bushes are encouraged to take off their sandals, hide their face, then contact the fire department and a rabbi.

Monday, April 29

Music Monday: RIP George Jones

by Scott Lydon 20 days ago

Happy Music Monday! On Friday, the great George Jones went off to join the great band in the sky. Today we're paying tribute to a man who lived like a rock star and sang like- well, nobody'd mistake him for an angel, so we'll just say a hero. We'll start with his first Number One hit, an ode to moonshine.

George Jones - White Lightning

George Jones manages to capture the fun of cooking up illegal liquor. Never mind that it might make you go blind or die. It's fun to take risks! And, truthfully, it's impossible to hear this song and not feel the same way. Say what you will about Snoop Dogg's love of marijuana, but it's no less illegal than George Jones' moonshine. Although Snoop probably can't play the guitar this well.

A former Marine who was born in Texas singing about breaking a Federal law. It just doesn't get more American than that. See you after the jump for more.

Wednesday, April 24

Hard To Find Safe News Lately: Woot Weads The Wire

wire

by Scott Lydon 25 days ago

Every week in this space, we’ll take a look at the news and offer our own incisive blend of commentary, analysis, and poop jokes. The news you need, from a voice you can trust, in the 90 seconds you have to spare: that’s Woot Weads the Wire.

HONOLULU (UPI) -- A Texas teenager on a Make-A-Wish Foundation sponsored trip to Hawaii caught a 759-pound marlin with the help of a boat crew.

Traditionally, a fish large than 750 pounds is known as a "Marlin Brando."

Monday, April 22

Music Monday: Directional Songs

by Scott Lydon a month ago

Happy Music Monday! Do you know which way you're facing now? Well, that's the start point on our wonderful journey through the maze of music. Close your eyes. Take a deep breath. Get settled. And then do what the music says. If nothing else, you'll get some exercise as you move around the room. Okay, now, get ready… three, two, one… we're off!

The Beatles - I'm Down

Down has been the primary direction for music for a long, long time. Rappers get down, dancers get down, some rock stars get down and then also get dirty, and even Swan Lake has some down under the wings of the main characters. And don't even get me started on the blues. Why is down so important? Maybe it's because, without down, there's no place from which to grow.

Get the idea? More directionals coming up, just after the jump.

Monday, April 15

Music Monday: Names That Don't Belong In Rock

by Scott Lydon a month ago

Happy Music Monday! Today Scott's lost his mind and gathered a bunch of people you've probably never heard of because they have names that don't sound like rock stars. Yeah, we know. He's just been under a lot of pressure lately, okay? Anyway, take a look, maybe you'll have a few ideas of your own...

Grayson Hugh - Talk It Over

The late '80s were sort of like rock's midlife crisis. All the new stuff was in electronic music and hip hop wasn't yet mainstream, but all the classic bands were either broken up or sucking. That context should explain why a guy who dressed like a Guardian Angel could stick two backup singers in suitcases and score a minor hit, all with a name like "Grayson." To be fair, he's not a bad singer, but the moment he was up against a guy named Ice T, poor Grayson had no chance.

See you after the jump for what might end up being our least-read Music Monday of all time. Wish us luck!