Monday, April 22

Music Monday: Directional Songs

by Scott Lydon a month ago

Happy Music Monday! Do you know which way you're facing now? Well, that's the start point on our wonderful journey through the maze of music. Close your eyes. Take a deep breath. Get settled. And then do what the music says. If nothing else, you'll get some exercise as you move around the room. Okay, now, get ready… three, two, one… we're off!

The Beatles - I'm Down

Down has been the primary direction for music for a long, long time. Rappers get down, dancers get down, some rock stars get down and then also get dirty, and even Swan Lake has some down under the wings of the main characters. And don't even get me started on the blues. Why is down so important? Maybe it's because, without down, there's no place from which to grow.

Get the idea? More directionals coming up, just after the jump.

Monday, April 15

Music Monday: Names That Don't Belong In Rock

by Scott Lydon a month ago

Happy Music Monday! Today Scott's lost his mind and gathered a bunch of people you've probably never heard of because they have names that don't sound like rock stars. Yeah, we know. He's just been under a lot of pressure lately, okay? Anyway, take a look, maybe you'll have a few ideas of your own...

Grayson Hugh - Talk It Over

The late '80s were sort of like rock's midlife crisis. All the new stuff was in electronic music and hip hop wasn't yet mainstream, but all the classic bands were either broken up or sucking. That context should explain why a guy who dressed like a Guardian Angel could stick two backup singers in suitcases and score a minor hit, all with a name like "Grayson." To be fair, he's not a bad singer, but the moment he was up against a guy named Ice T, poor Grayson had no chance.

See you after the jump for what might end up being our least-read Music Monday of all time. Wish us luck!

Friday, April 12

Zappos Vs Woot: The Big Chompdown

by Scott Lydon a month ago

It's not often we meet a company that's lower in the alphabet than we are, so when our brothers-in-arms over at Zappos gave us a call on the Subsidiary Hotline and invited us to a doughnut-eating contest, what else could we do but say yes? And so, caution went out into the wind, everyone took off their belts and wore their sweatpants, and both teams ordered in several dozen Krispy Kreme doughnuts… each.

Could the hungry Texans at Woot.com defeat the combined forces of Zappos and Amazon Toronto at a doughnut eating contest? After the jump, it's TX vs LV with a little CA on the side! OUR FIRST INTERNATIONAL COMPETITION!!!

Wednesday, April 10

Is That Positive Or Negative?: Woot Weads The Wire

by Scott Lydon a month ago

Every week in this space, we’ll take a look at the news and offer our own incisive blend of commentary, analysis, and poop jokes. The news you need, from a voice you can trust, in the 90 seconds you have to spare: that’s Woot Weads the Wire.

CHICAGO (UPI) -- The Chicago Department of Transportation has declared this weekend "Potholepalooza," a three-day festival of reporting potholes.

In keeping with the city-wide theme, all bars will charge $16 for a small plastic cup of beer, and anyone leaving the city will not be allowed back in without a wristband.

Monday, April 08

Music Monday: Call Me

by Scott Lydon a month ago

Happy Music Monday! So here's a funny story: last week Scott had already pre-planned a Music Monday all about phone call songs, and only then did he discover that April 3rd was the 40th anniversary of the cell phone! Nice coincidence, right? So please consider this mix a tribute to the device that changed the world. We'll hand you the receiver and let you hear this first song…

Go West - Call Me

That bright burst at the beginning is a perfect start to a song about a telephone, right? And Go West was never going to be a game changer, especially not with that seizure dance goin' on, but wasn't this was the perfect song for zipping around Vice City? It's meaningless metaphor-filled synth pop with a simple message. I wish you were here, give me a call.

If you can't find your way inside, give us a call and we'll help you out. See you after the jump?

Wednesday, April 03

As Long As They Bring Back Peri :Woot Weads The Wire

by Scott Lydon 2 months ago

Every week in this space, we’ll take a look at the news and offer our own incisive blend of commentary, analysis, and poop jokes. The news you need, from a voice you can trust, in the 90 seconds you have to spare: that’s Woot Weads the Wire.

LOS ALAMOS, N.M. (UPI) -- A supercomputer that was once the fastest in the world -- and the first to break a computing speed milestone -- has been retired, U.S. researchers say.

The computer's final act will be to throw out the opening pawn for the Deep Blue vs Deep Fritz match this weekend.

Monday, April 01

Music Monday: Fooled You

by Scott Lydon 2 months ago

Happy Music Monday! It's April 1st, and if you don't know what day this is, you're in biiiiig trouble. But if you do, great! You've guessed what our theme is this week! We'll let Scott get started with his first foolish choice:

Led Zeppelin - Fool In The Rain

A lovely song from an often-underrated Zep album, this fool is one of those guys who fell in love with the wrong woman. But if it wasn't for loving and losing, where would songs like this come from?

We get more foolish inside, after the jump. See you fools there...

Wednesday, March 27

Hey, Look (My Finances) Over: Woot Weads The Wire

by Scott Lydon 2 months ago

Every week in this space, we’ll take a look at the news and offer our own incisive blend of commentary, analysis, and poop jokes. The news you need, from a voice you can trust, in the 90 seconds you have to spare: that’s Woot Weads the Wire.

NEW YORK (UPI) -- Actress Tilda Swinton's performance art piece at New York's Museum of Modern Art featured the Scottish actress sleeping all day long inside a glass box.

A similar performance happens every day in the nearby coffee shop's pastry case.

Monday, March 25

Music Monday: Commercial Jingles

by Scott Lydon 2 months ago

Happy Music Monday! Today we're selling out. That's right, it's all about the commercials today. Scott's chased down five songs that are forever entwined with the products for which they were shilling. Hey, if it pays the bills, who are we to judge? As long as they keep it entertaining, everybody's happy. And this first video's a perfect example...

Shaggy - Boombastic

How do you turn a song into a masterpiece? Claymation! This Levi's ad told a whole action movie worth of story in roughly a minute, all while selling jeans AND reminding people to go buy Shaggy's record. Talk about running the table.

Four more and the usual fun after the jump!

Friday, March 22

Chip Challenge: Crunch Crunch Crunch

by Scott Lydon 2 months ago

We've eaten British Kit Kats We've eaten Easter eggs. But today we're taking on the staple of snack foods that every human being must eat at one time or another: THE NOBLE POTATO CHIP!

Don't they look great? Sure are a lot better than those other snooty flavors a bunch of fancy-pants comedians reviewed. No, we're not jealous they did it first. We never even WANTED to review those chips. We wanted to review THESE chips from the START!

And after the jump, we will. See you inside.