A life-changing laptop
When you get an Asus, it changes your whole world!
You know how sometimes you shout out random words and it startles those around you? Well, you don't have to shout them anymore! You can type them into your Asus! And if the typing sound startles people, it means they've got really sensitive ears, and that's not your problem.
And you know how people on the bus get annoyed at you when you try to re-enact your favorite movies pretending all the characters are cats? Well, with an Asus, you don't have to do that anymore. You can just put a DVD into its SuperMulti DVD±RW drive, press play, and then provide insightful commentary as to how things would be different if everyone was feline.
And you know how your always spending your nights in total darkness because you were playing Imaginary Pinata with a real bat and you knocked out all the lights? Not with an Asus you don't because its 15.6" is backlit! So, as long as the screen's on, you've got some illumination!
And you know how you used to be scared of doors because you were worried there was someone hiding behind each one wearing a scary mask? Well, now you can be the guy who's scared of doors who also just happens to own an Asus laptop!
See the difference a good computer makes!