Wax On, Woot-Off
I just want you to know: if I can't mount a 50-inch TV to the wall next to my desk, you can shove your stupid job. OK? Now you can start the interview.
We were giving our warehouse its spring cleaning, its vernal sprucification, its annual zhuzhing - and look at this crazy gunk we scraped off the shelves! This Woot-Off promises to be full of surprises! (And now that we've said that, a complete lack of surprises would, itself, count as a "surprise". Called it.)