chumby 8

by Wootbot

Hide your documents, hide your files

Ladies and gentleman, I, John Chumby, have successfully quarantined the internet.

Too long has the lewd swine known as the World Wide Web been allowed to mingle with innocent files and programs of our computers. Too long have the vile websites been free to corrupt the poor, unsuspecting contact information stored on our smart phones or the young and chaste photos of our tablets. For years now, I have searched for a method of confinement, so that the internet may be allowed to wallow in its filthiness without damaging the fragile ecosystem known as “off-line.”

Well, today, I am proud to announce that I have succeeded. Behold, the chumby 8, or as I like to call it, the Internet Snare. With its streamlined, intuitive navigation, 1500+ free apps, and browser support, the chumby 8 effectively traps the Internet on its 8” LCD touchscreen. Podcasts, celebrity gossip, internet radio, social media sites: they have only each other (and the few photos or videos you deem brave enough to enter the fray) to pick on now.

Of course, this isn’t to imply that all I seek is separation between online and offline content. You see, in such a tight space, it won’t be long until the internet grows claustrophobic and irritable. This will likely lead to a great war between websites, which will only come to an end when the entirety of the online world has been destroyed. Then, and only then, will I consider my work finished.

Authorized for SquareTrade Extended Warranty



Warranty: 1 Year chumby

Condition: New

So, what’s a chumby anyway?

A chumby takes your favorite parts of the internet and delivers them to you in a friendly, always-on, always-fresh format. It’s a window into your internet life that lives outside your desktop, so content like weather, news, celebrity gossip, podcasts, music, and more has a place to play away from your world of documents and spreadsheets. Just plug in your chumby, connect to your wireless network, and create a lineup of favorites from over 1,500 apps in more than 30 categories, with new ones arriving all the time. Then let your chumby do its thing — streaming everything you like, from sports scores to stock quotes, from video clips to interactive games, from photos to trivia.



Additional Photos:

Red chumby

Black chumby

Where does a chumby belong?


Media Types Supported:

What you must provide to make the chumby work

In the box:

photo credit: randysonofrobert
photo credit: ark