It’s Really Just A Population Control Thing
Once upon a time, in a magical land known as Texas, there was a little armadillo named Kevin, who was kind and good and worked in an office.
Each afternoon, Kevin would walk out of his office and head to the cafeteria, whistling a happy song. “What’s the special today, Kevin?” asked the friendly badger who kept track of paper clips and pens. “I hear the mahi mahi’s really good!” said the cheerful dolphin that handled the accounting issues. “Make sure they save me some bamboo!” said the pleasant panda with the desk beside the bathrooms. Kevin was always happy when he walked to lunch because it reminded him that he had so many animal friends.
But there was one animal that never talked to Kevin. An animal that almost never talked to anybody. And that was the hamster who worked in the creative department. Each day, the hamster would arrive around noon, already drunk, and would walk to his office as quickly as possible. “Please don’t take the pens home even by accident!” called the friendly badger without looking up. “Try not to claim so many invalid expenses on your next business trip!” said the dolphin a little too loud. “Oh my GOD stop hitting on me you smell like cedar chips and eat your YOUNG!” said the pleasant panda. And every day, this would made Kevin feel sad, because he was a kind and good armadillo and he knew that the hamster had the potential to be an excellent employee if only properly trained.
One day, Kevin opened a box to find some Ed Hardy 1:12 Scale RC Cars. Kevin loved cars, especially cars with working headlights and functional brake lights, so he decided to take his lunch early. Kevin looked at the Mercedes SLR, the BMW M6, and the Lamborghini Murcielago each available in two different colors. It was so hard to choose his favorite! Finally he grabbed one at random and headed to the parking lot.
Once Kevin arrived in the parking lot, however, all thoughts of an afternoon spent enjoying the built in speaker that provided engine noises and a real working horn were instantly forgotten. Because there, on the curb, was the poor hamster, all alone, listening to Morrissey, and crying. Kevin walked over and sat down.
“What’s wrong?” Kevin asked the hamster. The hamster looked up with tears in his furry eyes. “No one here likes me, Kevin! No one at all!”
“That’s not true!” lied Kevin. “Everyone likes you!” And not knowing what else to do, Kevin handed the hamster the RC controller. “Would you like to drive my Ed Hardy 1:12 Scale RC Car?”
The hamster was shocked. “Really? You'd let me do that? You don’t even care that I eat my young?”
“Well, I have to admit that’s kind of creepy,” replied Kevin. “But friendship is about overcoming differences to find a common ground!” And as he said this, he handed the hamster the included Ed Hardy Decal Sheets. “So why don’t we sit out here and decorate the car together?” And that’s just what they did.
So from then on, every day around noon, Kevin would tell the friendly badger about the special, offer to taste the mahi mahi for the cheerful dolphin, and be sure to save some bamboo for the pleasant panda. But he would always spend the last fifteen minutes of his lunch break in the parking lot with his new friend the hamster, racing the well-decorated Ed Hardy 1:12 Scale RC Car, together. And never again did the hamster tell anyone what he had packed for lunch.
Warranty: 90 Day World Trading 23
- Full function radio controlled car
- Working headlights and tail lights
- Makes engine sound, and horn noises; honk the horn and turn the lights on from the remote control
- 1:12 scale Lamborghini Murcielago, BMW ASC6, and Mercedes Benz SLR McLaren cars
- 7.2 volt NI-MH rechargeable battery with 700mAh
- Rubber wheels, Lamborghini and Mercedes have wide rear wheels just like the actual car
- Controllable up to a 110 foot radius
- Comes with 4 AA batteries, ready to go out of the box
- Select your favorite car (Lamborghini, Mercedes Benz, BMW) but we'll pick which color car to send you
In the box:
- Ed Hardy 1:12 Luxury RC Car Replica
- Radio Control Transmitter
- 2 Ed Hardy Decal Sheets
- Rechargeable Battery Pack