Flash In The Brain Pan: Burrito Bison

by Scott Lydon


Hang on, hang on, we're not done just yet! For our Keep America Weird week flash game, we decided to do the weirdest thing we could think of… pass the choice to someone else! After the jump, you'll get to play a little game chosen by Social Media Coordinator and voice of @Woot herself, Kristy Tye. Here's a hint of what she chose for you…



See you after the jump!

In honor of the week, I was going for some sort of weird, American themed Flash game. And what's more American than the bison, whom we quite nearly killed off, and burritos, which ended up as a delicious Americanized bastardization of Mexican food? Burrito Bison seems to have no real ties to burritos at all (and only a tenuous link to the four-legged buffalos we're familiar with) but the name charmed me.

As you can see in the image up there, it all starts off innocently enough. A muscular, half-dressed bison-man is shopping, most likely for tortillas, avocados, tomatoes... you know, the usual! Then BOOM, he trips and falls head first into an ill-placed bag that somehow transports him into Candy Land, to be pitted against some sort of sugar monster while gummy bears look on.



Your bison will quickly find itself able to launch out of the wrestling ring. And, hey, bonus: extra cash if you're able to time it correctly to hit the center star and whack your opponent before sailing majestically into a crowd of fleeing gummy bears.



The game play is pretty simplistic- bounce off the gummy bears to keep going (and steal cash), buy the various upgrades so that you can bounce further and better, and eventually bounce so well, you free yourself from the candy horror. But why the gummy bear police keep putting you back in the ring, you may never know.



My favorite bonus item? The pogo stick. Once you take it from a jerk gummy bear, BO-OI-OI-OI-OING- smooth sailing, my friend.

So, how did you do on Burrito Bison? Did you finally escape their gooey clutches or did you just sit back and enjoy bouncing off their springy heads? Show us how far you got or how much money you made and you may be the winner of one whole quality post, you lucky Wooter, you.