Wax On, Woot-Off
Scanners are the 21st Century's version of Xerox machines. And you'd be amazed at the quality of butt scans they can produce.
We were giving our warehouse its spring cleaning, its vernal sprucification, its annual zhuzhing - and look at this crazy gunk we scraped off the shelves! This Woot-Off promises to be full of surprises! (And now that we've said that, a complete lack of surprises would, itself, count as a "surprise". Called it.)