BIG Jambox! For your BIGGEST Jams!
Hey, summer's almost over, and you know what that means, right? It means all those summer jams are USELESS TO YOU NOW. THAT'S RIGHT. PLAYED OUT. OVER. WORTHLESS ONCE MORE. And that means... hooray! It's time for you to start thinking about the hottest Winter Jams again!
With a Jawbone BIG Jambox, you'll be able to enjoy the BIGGEST Jams. And only the biggest jams. Don't get sentimental and look back and think it's time to get retro. Retro Jams are A TOTALLY DIFFERENT THING. You'd need a separate Jawbone Jambox to handle Retro Jams.
In fact, you should probably get yet another Jambox for all the new songs that are just out. How will you know if they're BIG Jams until you've heard them? You don't AND SHOULDN'T AND POSSIBLY CAN'T want to mix New Jams with Retro Jams and BIG Jams. And that's even before we consider the Slow Jams, Makeout Jams, Workout Jams and Study Jams you'll be wanting.
My our math, every human being in the United States needs to buy at least 17 different Jawbone BIG Jamboxes in order to properly coordinate their Jamz. Please, do your part.