Jawbone JAMBOX Bluetooth Speaker

by wootbot

Audiopreservatives

Wireless speaker or jam container? Why can't it be both?

Welcome back to Things That Are Also Other Things!

[studio audience applauds angrily]

Okay, so this thing in my hand that's playing music WITHOUT the use of wires is a JAMBOX.

[deafening applause, a guy in the back really freaking out]

And it kind of looks like a tiny coffin--

LAWYER: My client is not in any way implying that JAMBOX and its creator Jawbone has any intention of marketing death to the public and besides death is everywhere we're all going to die in fact my young niece is already learning about death and she's 5 so there's no reason to take any sort of legal action based on the comparison of the JAMBOX speaker to a death receptacle which it does pretty much look like.

--so cute. Anyway, the JAMBOX got us thinking: What if it could also hold jam, thereby making it a...

AUDIENCE: THING THAT IS ALSO ANOTHER THING.

[frenzied applause, some audience members start speaking in tongues]

Great, well done! Well, I have here a JAMBOX and we're just going to try to fill it with strawberry jam...here we go...ew, it's all sticky...hmm, this doesn't seem to be working...let's just put in more jam......uh huh......hmm......uh oh.......nope nope...........this is failing......is there a doctor in the house haha?

AUDIENCE: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA.

​[molotov cocktail lands on stage]

Well, we're out of time--

LAWYER: My client does not wish to imply that time is a construct as per the laws of physics but merely wishes to state that the network is shutting us down because nothing lasts forever no even you will perish one day and no one is safe from the spectre of inevitable death look it up you know I'm right.

I don't know who that is, we don't have a lawyer.

[audience tears down the set as a saxophone quartet plays the theme from M*A*S*H]