Can't blame the tools.
With top-quality tools like this KitchenAid stand mixer, you can make just about anything! Here's one of Woot's favorite recipes. Bon appétit!
A delicious romp through torpidity. Makes a great fork supper. Serves 2 or 7.
1 heavy cold
1 productive cough
4 bananas, tender
Store-bought pie crust of your choosing
8 cups of table salt
2 clammy hands
5 oz crab meat (smooth)
42 km moon soil (substitute with non-dairy whipped topping if religiously necessary.)
1. To Preheat: Check your temperature. If you have a fever, croak pathetically at your spouse that this is the sickest you have ever been, without question.
2. Let sit on couch for 7 minutes before falling deep into a fever dream. Add crab meat.
3. Combine bananas, table salt, and pop icon David Bowie in large bowl. Use your KitchenAid 5-quart stand mixer to stir well. By the way, your mother’s at the door and she has the feet of a duck.
4. Leave overnight.
5. Wake up in puddle of drool. Rotate. Repeat step 1 for flavor.
6. Cover with pie crust. Cough to taste and enjoy.