Wax On, Woot-Off
Don't buy this so you can watch the game. Buy it so you can see the score. Or more importantly, so your friend can watch the score. The score that says your team is better than his. Isn't that worth the best TV money can buy?
We were giving our warehouse its spring cleaning, its vernal sprucification, its annual zhuzhing - and look at this crazy gunk we scraped off the shelves! This Woot-Off promises to be full of surprises! (And now that we've said that, a complete lack of surprises would, itself, count as a "surprise". Called it.)