Woot-Libs: A [half-drunk on cough syrup] Woot-Off!
Use the emergency whistle in this one to annoy all the people too jaded and cynical to come out of their homes and see who's whistling and bleeding in the street.
Remember that game you played as a kid (that we're not able to name directly for trademark reasons) where you'd fill in the blanks with nouns and adjectives and stuff? For this Woot-Off we're asking you, our loyal denizens, to help us write a bunch of upcoming writeups in a similar fashion. Play along here!