Wax On, Woot-Off
Better safe than sorry, that's my motto. Ever since that time I was just minding my own business, out for a jog through the neighbor's sprinklers, jammin' to the sweet sounds pouring from my wireless headphones when that terrifying beast attacked! Thank goodness it was only a Pomeranian. But from now on, it's Kevlar fiber headphones all the way.
We were giving our warehouse its spring cleaning, its vernal sprucification, its annual zhuzhing - and look at this crazy gunk we scraped off the shelves! This Woot-Off promises to be full of surprises! (And now that we've said that, a complete lack of surprises would, itself, count as a "surprise". Called it.)