The 7.1-Fold Path
Everybody says that spiritual enlightenment is difficult to attain. Nah -- you just gotta buy one of these thingies.
Siddhartha came upon a fig tree and rested in the shade below it. He closed his eyes and thought about his life. He had lived the life of royal indulgence as a young man, but had failed to achieve happiness. Then he had abandoned everything and lived the severe life an ascetic, but still he found no peace. What was he missing?
The young man resolved to sit beneath the fig tree until he achieved full awareness. He sat and sat, silently breathing and reflecting. Then, as a wind comes to the sea, a great waft of realization came to him: In his previous endeavors he had never had a truly excellent AV receiver.
He realized that he must get out from under that dirty tree and go buy an Onkyo 7.2 Receiver with Bluetooth and Wi-Fi. No longer would he suffer in the endless cycle of existence, but could free himself through lossless streaming playback from his PC and devices.
A profound change came over the man as he thought about watching Judge Dredd in an immersive 8-speaker environment. A particular smile crept onto his lips, and he breathed a sigh of blissful relief.