So Sous Me
For every dreamer who's ever said "Someday I'm going to be a sous-chef."
"I... I dont know. I guess I'm feeling a little shy tonight."
"Oh, come on, baby. You know it drives me wild when we play sous-chef."
"OK, OK. Here I go, taking my Shun Edo slicer out of the knife block."
"That's right. That's right. Does it feel good in your hand? You like that contoured, resin-impregnated Pakkawood handle, don't you?"
"You know it. Now I'm chopping this celery to put in these salads. Because, um, I'm a sous-chef. Just the way you like."
"Mmmm, you certainly are. Let the weight of the knife do the work, baby. Look at the clean cut you get from that VG10 super-steel, you big strong sous-chef, you."
"Yep. That's me. A sous-chef. Now I'm checking to see if the line has enough fresh basil."
"Does it? Does it?"
"Looks a little low."
"So now what are you going to do?"
"I'm going to use these herb shears to cut some new basil off this plant."
"Yes! Yes! You're a sous-chef! Keep that kitchen running smoothly and efficiently!"
"And now I better taste this sauce. Hmmm. Needs some pepper."
"Yes! Oh, baby, prepare those ingred- uh, hey, where are you going?"
"To the walk-in freezer..."
"...to get high with the busboys."