You Gotta Tag That, Moff: Woot Weads The Wire

by Scott Lydon

Every week in this space, we’ll take a look at the news and offer our own incisive blend of commentary, analysis, and poop jokes. The news you need, from a voice you can trust, in the 90 seconds you have to spare: that’s Woot Weads the Wire.

HADEERA, Israel (UPI) -- A hiker was hospitalized after a sheep attacked him Saturday on the Israel National Trail, authorities said.

The police reported the incident as assault and baaattery.

 

Sheep

 

LONDON (UPI) -- The current version of "Doctor Who" will return for an eighth season with actor Matt Smith, who has played the Doctor since 2010, producer Steven Moffat said.

Fans are torn between being thrilled the show will continue and heartbroken that they accidentally learned a spoiler for next season.

WASHINGTON (UPI) -- The Internal Revenue Service has canceled a Friday softball game with a team from the office of a Republican senator critical of the federal tax agency.

A spokesperson for the IRS said they prefer to play… hardball.

 

Softball at the Lloyd!

 

LOS ANGELES (UPI) -- Televangelist Pat Robertson has received criticism for telling the wife of a cheating husband she should get over it because "males have a tendency to wander."

Insiders say he's also received fist bumps, high fives, and several thank you cards from married rock stars, rappers and athletes.

WASHINGTON, May 16 (UPI) -- A House Democrat has proposed gun control legislation he says was inspired by the latest James Bond movie, "Skyfall."

The legislation is said to start well but perhaps relies a little too much on references to other, more-beloved bills.

Sheep from Mike Haller and Softballat the Lloyd! from Seth Werkheiser are used under a Creative Commons License.