Thanks so much to everyone who watched the live stream, fought with their clan, chased down a BoC, endured the Final Boss Breakdown and enjoyed our 10th Birthday Celebration. Now we're going to go collapse and invite you to do the same. We love you all.
All week we’ve been flagrantly promoting World of Wootcrap, an epic game of e-commerce adventure. No doubt you have questions about this decennial celebratory questiny, so read on and all loins will be girded:
Great news about today: Not only can you ignore your vital daily chores and eschew productivity at work - we’ve also cleverly provided opportunities for you to spend money!
Three clans rest, stone-faced, on the icy field: V'owls, Squarryls, and Betta Koi.
"To Battle!" comes an unknown voice, and the armies march. But where? Why? What is the cause of this bloodshed, and, more importantly, how do you win at this stupid game?
Like any good early leveling opportunity (killing rats, retrieving a missing wedding ring), this one is both demeaning and pointless: POST A VIDEO OF YOURSELF DANCING LIKE A DANCING PARTY ANIMAL.
The best videos (in our unassailable taste) will be featured and harshly judged on our birthday this Friday. Happy Dancing! (And don't expect the mists of time to reveal your new level right away. The level gods are busy).
Embed a YouTube video like this: [youtube=VideoID][/youtube], or just post a link to a Vine, Newsreel, or whatever the heck you want.
Hey, this thread is SQUARRYLS ONLY, okay? If you post in here without a Squarryl logo, your post will be deleted and you'll lose experience too. But if you're a Squarryl, come on in and learn about your clan...
Hey, this thread is BETTA KOI ONLY, okay? If you post in here without a Betta Koi logo, your post will be deleted and you'll lose experience too. But if you're Betta Koi, come on in and learn about your clan...
Hey, this thread is V'OWLS ONLY, okay? If you post in here without a V'owl logo, your post will be deleted and you'll lose experience too. But if you're a V'owl, come on in and learn about your clan...
Are you a mighty Squarryl, drawing strength and sustenance from the middle-lands? Or a valiant V'owl that soars above the mountain high-lands? Or perhaps you're a stalwart Betta Koi, standing firm against those who would pit their wit against yours?
Keep an eye on your Forums User Info Place (you know, this thing) to see if the mist has changed you yet. Once you've been transformed, take note of your friends. Stare through bitter eyes at your enemies. Peek at the blog now and again to learn what those experience points are all about. And gird your loins for the combat that will inevitably begin at about 11am (Central) on July 11th. For when the battle begins, all loins shall be at risk, and only the most-girded shall arise victoriously!
Curious who's in what Clan? Lichme made a handy cheat-sheet.
Has it really been 260 fortnights? Has Woot existed for one-hundredth of a millennium already? Where did those two Roman lustra go? Yes, this month Woot celebrates 70 dog years of questionable business decisions and occasionally reliable customer service - and we're passing the jubilation on to you with our Woot 10 celebration! Please enjoy:
Our live birthday Wootcast, 9 a.m. - 5 p.m. PST, Friday, July 11: A full day of jinks both hi- and lo-, streamed live from the Woot studios! The centerpiece will be a participatory ecommerce experience utterly unlike anything ever yet attempted anywhere by anybody. We'll reveal more later. Seriously, this is gonna be insane.
$10 daily shirts at Shirt.Woot: All month long, our shirt store is turning back the price clock with $10 featured shirts every day! Let's party like it's 2004 except we didn't have a T-shirt store in 2004 so more like 2007 but that's confusing with the whole 10-year-anniversary thing so let's just say 2004! Awooh!
Woot Vault product descriptions: With all this partying going on, who's got time to write new product descriptions for every single Today's Woot deal? Not us! So we're flipping through our stash of thousands of product writeups and featuring the choicest deep cuts in the main writeup space on each Woot site.
Games, videos, giveaways, animal fights, and more: We're working on all kinds of fun to celebrate ten years of Woot in the most fitting of ways: with a scattershot, slapped-together jumble of ill-conceived folly. Catch it!
Most of all, Woot 10 is a gift to thank you, the fans, for keeping us alive as we near puberty. You don't even have to buy anything. But you know, come on, we've gone to a lot of trouble here. Would it kill you to flip us a couple of bucks?
Was it really just one year ago that we here over here announcing that Woot Tools & Garden had bloomed from the harsh cold ground? It's hard to believe, but it's true. Something like 52 Mondays hence, that little site came to life. And now it seems like it's always been here.
Anyway, in honor of this very special day, we're having a little celebration for the next fortnight*. Check out a special soundtrack, or the Woot Tools & Garden main page, or the various Woot Plus sales, or our Facebook, or maybe even our Twitter because in some or all of these places you'll see us giving away our presents to you! Sadly, we can't offer slices of cake. You'll have to buy that somewhere else.
*if you don't know what a fortnight is maybe look it up on this new thing called Google