Friday, June 12

Winners' Gallery: the Best of Contest 224

by Josephus & shan24

It's a fascinating Website, this repository of random patent office artifacts. Who would ever have suspected that every single one of them would work? Woot.com's arrangement with www.patentoffice.gov that they will sell one item each day from the junkyard is no doubt lucrative for them, but it is troubling that we have no idea what any of these items do. The Brazilian drug dealer who purchased last Monday's item, for example, had no idea that it was a parallel universe mixer. If he had, he might not have turned the danged thing on, and cause the unfortunate blip that resulted in our having two camping themed contests within a matter of weeks. No matter, now that we've gotten it back, I'll just push this button with the back arrow on it and see if we can reset the univer-

Show us a past or current woot as a kid attending a summer camp.

First Place - $100
olpmcg - Monkey space camp

What happens when you hurl into your helmet? And thank you, olpmcg, for the "before" shot and for omitting the "after" shot.

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Wednesday, June 10

Winners' Gallery: the Best of Contest 223

by shan24 & Josephus

At some point in the recent past, we asked you to show us an awkward, embarrassing photo of the family of a past or current Woot product. When you've got it, flaunt it, we say. Look below for some serious flaunting, ignorant of social mores and norms, and all the happier for it. We should all be so ignorant!

First Place - $100
beatfarmer - Elvis & His Lady Friend

Oh what to laugh at first...the sideburns? The crossed eyes? The glasses? The sweater? The odd background? Hmm...it's all so tempting!

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Tuesday, June 09

Winners' Gallery: the Best of Contest 222

by Josephus & shan24

Dear Ms. Somers:

First of all, we would like to assure you that we do remember the major role your product played in the launch and early months of Woot.com!. And, yes, we suppose it is true that your entire lifestyle was in fact supported by woot items. Technically, your submissions are exactly in line with the theme of this contest. However, woot has no control over the picks that our judges make in this contest each week. We just post the winners. While the photos of you using the Ab-Tilt have greatly enthralled our copywriters, and slowed down progress on our production of a giant Alex Trebek head to go with our Giant Ken Jennings head and the nearly complete Giant Drew Carey head, we would like you to quit sending the photos. Please understand, THIS CONTEST IS OVER. If you will continue reading, you will see that your photo of you doing stretches on your jungle gym made of Ab-Tilts didn't win. In addition, the negligee pose, while very artistic, apparently was a double exposure, which unfortunately gave you well-defined twelvepack abs, surely not your intent. While you did not make the winners page, we can assure you that if you use the code HONMEN-SS*, we will provide you, and you alone, free shipping on one woot item of the current ilk. If you look below, you will see that none of your entries won. In fact, since you sent the photos directly to Jason Toon, no-one but Jason, and his online geek buddies, and everyone on Facebook, ever saw any of them, and they were never posted in the contest forum. Please, Ms. Somers, in future, ask your aide to read the rules (or guidelines for certain contests)for you. Enjoy the results from: Show us a scene from a typical day in the life of someone who only owns and uses things sold on Woot!

*code will not actually work - just like the real code!

First Place - $100
toby8915 - Delivery

We're going to have to insist that someone post a bad first entry one of these weeks.

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Monday, June 08

Woot Contest 225: You Send Us

by Jason Toon

Sorry we flaked on a contest last week, 'Choppers: we were away from our proverbial desks, getting paid to attend a videogame convention. Life's funny, huh? Anyway, it got us thinking about where we should go next. Of course, we're out of ideas. So we're turning to you. By now, between our E3 and CES blogathons, you've had plenty of opportunity to see Jason's, Dave's, Scott's, and Matthew's ugly mugs gallivanting around, getting in the way of the grownups conducting legitimate business. Now use those images to imagineer (sorry, it's E3 talking) our next blog adventure:

Show us where the Woot bloggers should go next, and what we should do there.

Just keep it clean-ish, and make sure you get our good sides. And let us know if you figure out what our good sides are.

Post your entry here by 11:59 AM (central) on Monday, June 15, 2009. Prizes are $20/$50/$100 for 3rd/2nd/1st. The rules and criteria for winning: our panel of volunteer judges can and will make stuff up as it goes along. Use Photoshop, linoleum blocks, pastels, MSPaint, cave painting, tattoos, tribal scarification, whatever, but it’ll only be judged if it’s visible in our forums as a jpg, gif, or png. As we are fond of saying, try to keep your maximum width to 550px. If you need a place to host your pictures, try www.imageshack.ws or www.photobucket.com. We have no connection to either, but they seem free and easy to use. And if you want us to be sure your entry was indeed your work, post links to your source images. The more sure we are that you did your own work, the more likely we are to consider it for a prize.

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Tuesday, May 26

Woot Contest 224: Camp Wund-Ay-Wund-Eel

by Jason Toon

Summer has unofficially begun, which means it's time again for lots of unofficial fun in the unofficial sun. And to parents of a certain socioeconomic bracket, that means packing the tots off to camp. What parent wouldn't sign over custody of their offspring for a couple of weeks of blissful serenity at home? What preteen wouldn't jump at the chance to enjoy swimming, insect bites, leathercrafts, and ritual humiliation away from Mom and Dad's prying eyes? The fact that the products we sell aren't human doesn't mean they feel any differently. Your challenge this week:

Show us a past or current woot as a kid attending a summer camp.

Post your entry here by 11:59 AM (central) on Monday, June 1, 2009. Prizes are $20/$50/$100 for 3rd/2nd/1st. The rules and criteria for winning: our panel of volunteer judges can and will make stuff up as it goes along. Use Photoshop, linoleum blocks, pastels, MSPaint, cave painting, tattoos, tribal scarification, whatever, but it’ll only be judged if it’s visible in our forums as a jpg, gif, or png. As we are fond of saying, try to keep your maximum width to 550px. If you need a place to host your pictures, try www.imageshack.ws or www.photobucket.com. We have no connection to either, but they seem free and easy to use. And if you want us to be sure your entry was indeed your work, post links to your source images. The more sure we are that you did your own work, the more likely we are to consider it for a prize.

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Friday, May 22

Winners' Gallery: the Best of Contest 221

by shan24 & Josephus

At some point in the recent past, we asked you to turn a past or current woot into a cute cartoony animal. I'm sure you're like us, you wait until the end of each Woot-off to see what cute, cartoony animal Woot is going to come up with next for us to use, abuse, manipulate and discombobulate. Personally I'm hoping for the kiwi bird. Or a koi fish. Ooh I know, a penguin with a jetpack.

First Place - $100
toby8915 - Squidward's Offspring

The love child of Squidward and Electra Eel.

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Tuesday, May 19

Winners' Gallery: the Best of Contest 220

by Josephus & shan24

In accordance with the Woot policy that all have a right to a Smartpost-speedy trial and verdict, we hereby sentence you to a five minute perusal of the results of our contest 220, in which we asked the prosecutors to show us scenes from a prison run by Woot.com. Let us begin with Exhibit #1, shall we?

Exhibit #1 - $100
ActorTom - Leakatraz

Every high tide, the screeching sounds are just horrible. Yep, there's something strange about this island...

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Monday, May 18

Contest 223: Those Special Memories We Wish We Could Forget

by Jason Toon

I guess I'm easily amused. Because all it takes is a pile of embarrassing family portraits like those at Awkward Family Photos and I'm not just laughing. I'm telling my friends about it, and blogging about it, and adapting a Photoshop contest theme from it. None of the people in those photos - with the probable exception of some of the teenagers - ever had any idea their photos would ever be laughed at by strangers around the world. And they certainly never expected they'd be used for something like this:

Show us an awkward, embarrassing photo of the family of a past or current Woot product.

Hairstyles, outfits, backdrops, facial expressions, poses: orchestrate them all to create an exquisitely squirm-worthy portrait.

Post your entry here by 11:59 AM (central) on Monday, May 25, 2009. Prizes are $20/$50/$100 for 3rd/2nd/1st. The rules and criteria for winning: our panel of volunteer judges can and will make stuff up as it goes along. Use Photoshop, linoleum blocks, pastels, MSPaint, cave painting, tattoos, tribal scarification, whatever, but it’ll only be judged if it’s visible in our forums as a jpg, gif, or png. As we are fond of saying, try to keep your maximum width to 550px. If you need a place to host your pictures, try www.imageshack.ws or www.photobucket.com. We have no connection to either, but they seem free and easy to use. And if you want us to be sure your entry was indeed your work, post links to your source images. The more sure we are that you did your own work, the more likely we are to consider it for a prize.

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Thursday, May 14

Winners' Gallery: the Best of Contest 219

by shan24 & Josephus

At some point in the recent past, we asked you to show us a scene from a world where Woot is illegal. Many of you already know what that feels like, if you work in an office that blocks 99% of all the good websites. Or if your boss likes to stand behind you very, very quietly like a ninja, spying on you. Doesn't he have anything better to do all day? The office worker is so oppressed these days...making Woot an illegal site is where I drew the line. Now, I can sit at home in my jammies and lurk around the Woot sites all the ding dong day. Or at least until my power gets cut o---

First Place - $100
fyrefall - Strange Tattoo

So the other gang's members probably have IWAN TONE on their knuckles right?

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Monday, May 11

Contest 222: Life By Woot

by Jason Toon & Josephus

We're appreciate everybody who ever buys anything from Woot. But we're a little disappointed at all the non-Woot stuff in their homes and places of business. I mean, come on, guys: are you committed to this thing or what? Perhaps some visualizations of this utopian dream will help inspire everyone to truly follow the Wootfold path. Your challenge this week:

Show us a scene from a typical day in the life of someone who only owns and uses things sold on Woot.


We mean everything, from a house built of woots to pants made from repurposed Woot shirts. We might allow an exception for food and drink, as long as it's prepared and served using Woot products. And after putting together your entry, don't be surprised by your irresistible urge to live it. It's powerful stuff.

Post your entry here by 11:59 AM (central) on Monday, May 18, 2009. Prizes are $20/$50/$100 for 3rd/2nd/1st. The rules and criteria for winning: our panel of volunteer judges can and will make stuff up as it goes along. Use Photoshop, linoleum blocks, pastels, MSPaint, cave painting, tattoos, tribal scarification, whatever, but it’ll only be judged if it’s visible in our forums as a jpg, gif, or png. As we are fond of saying, try to keep your maximum width to 550px. If you need a place to host your pictures, try www.imageshack.ws or www.photobucket.com. We have no connection to either, but they seem free and easy to use. And if you want us to be sure your entry was indeed your work, post links to your source images. The more sure we are that you did your own work, the more likely we are to consider it for a prize.


read more…