WootBot


quality posts: 15 Private Messages WootBot

Staff

In accordance with the Woot policy that all have a right to a Smartpost-speedy trial and verdict, we hereby sentence you to a five minute perusal of the results of our contest 220, in which we asked the prosecutors to show us scenes from a prison run by Woot.com. Let us begin with Exhibit #1, shall we?

Exhibit #1 - $100
ActorTom - Leakatraz

Every high tide, the screeching sounds are just horrible. Yep, there's something strange about this island...


Exhibit #2 - $50
LTU99 - The Big Scary Roomba Warden

As it happens, the warden is quite fond of very wide hallways, as well as these finely tailored matching uniforms. The work details wear a certain blue combo, and the guards' uniforms have a crimson coloring- it covers the bloodstains.


Exhibit #3 - $20
teamlook - Solitary Confinement

Not everything about our prison is all sunny and exercisoidal, though- some of the hard cases spend their time alone...


There are a few experimental Woot prisons, as shown in the following exhibits 4-14 (seriously, you weren't expecting this charade to continue forever, did you?)

Honorable Mentions:
Xexus - Single Con Prison

One Cell One Con One Day, what a deal! Somewhere nearby, the Woot prison bus is about to deliver the prisoner for his term.


ace101081 - shiv
By company charter, smuggling falls under shipping and would still be $5.


jmdoering -refurb prisoner
Ah, tedious work by a lifer! no wonder there are so many Sansas available!


Stavius - Woot.com Prison Cafeteria
"Bacon salts? Are you freaking kidding me?" -Someone better watch this man.


shepscrook - Cleanest prison ever
Hmm. is that Mel Gibson pushing that broom? Got to make certain the Woot floor shows up in all the publicity photos!


bradcrc - Flash Drive Maximum Security
Yeah, yeah, we know what's inside your overcoats. put 'em back on.


Monkey Prize
joe43wv -solitary

Oooh! such potential for this chop! Alas, he refused the help of all who tried to get him into an alias-free productive life, and clean from the jaggies that put him in solitary to begin with.


Money winners, please email your Paypal info to jtoon@woot.com. Monkey Prize winner, please email your shipping address to jtoon@woot.com. We must take a brief moment to remind new monkey prize winners who have yet to receive their new best friends, that you are NOT to feed them pistachios. Even the Woot pistachios are a potential problem. Let's just say that the shells of the pistachio are very, very hard, and in practice take a long, long time to, um, biodegrade. While that may not seem an issue, anyone who has visited the monkey house at their local zoo may understand that injury could well ensue. Honorable Mentioneers may use coupon code HONMEN-FS for free shipping on a future order. Until next time, remember, that the America which has contracted with Woot to run their prisons has also made certain that all detainees are kept outside the United States of America, so we have no problem using our Animatronic Elvii as prison doctors, or leaving miscreants in The Zune Room for a few days. or weeks.

HolyMythos


quality posts: 48 Private Messages HolyMythos

Haha, I like 2nd place the best. Congrats to all the winners and HMs!

bpeterson82


quality posts: 52 Private Messages bpeterson82

Congrats all!

Xexus


quality posts: 6 Private Messages Xexus

congrats everyone

Signature censored by Woot

bradcrc


quality posts: 11 Private Messages bradcrc

congrats winners!

FedUpOldHag


quality posts: 0 Private Messages FedUpOldHag

good job everyone. Loved your's ActorTom. And LTU99, that was some coloring there, must have taken a long time.


ActorTom


quality posts: 2 Private Messages ActorTom

Thanks to the judges for the win. Congrats fellow winners and HMs. I really liked this contest and Contest 219.

I really loved Xexus' photomat chop. Among the non-winners, I liked both Hogan's Heros chops. Jason does make a great Col. Klink!

LTU99


quality posts: 0 Private Messages LTU99

Congrats everyone. Thanks judges.

fyrefall


quality posts: 0 Private Messages fyrefall

Congrats all! Lots of good entries and good choices. Shepscrook, that logo on the floor is fabulous! And Xexus, the Shadow of the Woot sign is also perfect.

-FF

tehpwnerer


quality posts: 1 Private Messages tehpwnerer
fyrefall wrote:Congrats all! Lots of good entries and good choices. Shepscrook, that logo on the floor is fabulous! And Xexus, the Shadow of the Woot sign is also perfect.

-FF



I sometimes have the feeling that I want to be the adder of the chop contest. Congrats winners.

fyrefall


quality posts: 0 Private Messages fyrefall
tehpwnerer wrote:I sometimes have the feeling that I want to be the adder of the chop contest. Congrats winners.



Heh heh. That would make me the Paula of the contest. "joe43wv, you made that chop your own!"

joe43wv


quality posts: 14 Private Messages joe43wv

WOOT WOOT!!! My first winning photo and my prize is a monkey!! I'm so excited. Jtoon, I sent you my mailing address and am anxiously awaiting my prize. Thanks again WOOT!!!

tehpwnerer


quality posts: 1 Private Messages tehpwnerer
joe43wv wrote:WOOT WOOT!!! My first winning photo and my prize is a monkey!! I'm so excited. Jtoon, I sent you my mailing address and am anxiously awaiting my prize. Thanks again WOOT!!!



It's been one (maybe two) years now since I won, and I still have yet to receive the monkey. So, yeah, it's intense.

mrwolfe00


quality posts: 0 Private Messages mrwolfe00
tehpwnerer wrote:It's been one (maybe two) years now since I won, and I still have yet to receive the monkey. So, yeah, it's intense.



Flying monkeys = extinct

I ran home every day thinking it would be there. Now I cry a little inside to think it may never be.

-me

LTU99


quality posts: 0 Private Messages LTU99

Has this contest been paid out yet?

mrwolfe00


quality posts: 0 Private Messages mrwolfe00
LTU99 wrote:Has this contest been paid out yet?



no... i won like 7 months ago... been waiting for a monkey prize and money prize. I don't think woot likes us anymore.

-me

BML0579


quality posts: 0 Private Messages BML0579
mrwolfe00 wrote:no... i won like 7 months ago... been waiting for a monkey prize and money prize. I don't think woot likes us anymore.



i was paid for contest #218 on may 18th.

haven't got my monkey prizze for #221 and #222 yet.

wjenson


quality posts: 1 Private Messages wjenson
bradcrc wrote:congrats winners!



Was that a picture of the Old Montana State Prison

-You can't multiply wealth by dividing it.

toby8915


quality posts: 0 Private Messages toby8915

Just trying to refresh my memory as to what a winners' gallery looks like

fyrefall


quality posts: 0 Private Messages fyrefall
toby8915 wrote:Just trying to refresh my memory as to what a winners' gallery looks like




Congrats winners.....to this contest....so long ago...

ActorTom


quality posts: 2 Private Messages ActorTom
fyrefall wrote:Congrats winners.....to this contest....so long ago...



To be fair, the last contest winners were in 229, not 220.

HOWEVER --> THE LAST CONTEST RESULTS WERE POSTED OVER A MONTH AGO

IT'S BEEN OVER SIX WEEKS SINCE CONTEST 230 CLOSED, WITH NO RESULTS YET.

PAYMENTS HAVEN'T BEEN MADE IN 4 MONTHS. WHAT HAPPENED TO QUARTERLY PAYMENTS? (IS THERE SUCH A THING AS THIRDERLY?)

MONKEYS HAVEN'T GONE OUT IN TEN MONTHS.

IS THIS ANY WAY TO RUN A CONTEST?????

toby8915


quality posts: 0 Private Messages toby8915
ActorTom wrote:To be fair, the last contest winners were in 229, not 220.

HOWEVER --> THE LAST CONTEST RESULTS WERE POSTED OVER A MONTH AGO

IT'S BEEN OVER SIX WEEKS SINCE CONTEST 230 CLOSED, WITH NO RESULTS YET.

PAYMENTS HAVEN'T BEEN MADE IN 4 MONTHS. WHAT HAPPENED TO QUARTERLY PAYMENTS? (IS THERE SUCH A THING AS THIRDERLY?)

MONKEYS HAVEN'T GONE OUT IN TEN MONTHS.

IS THIS ANY WAY TO RUN A CONTEST?????



well to be fair, the subject matter for the derby was about a half hour late. That's about the same...right? Hello? Guys?

mwiseman


quality posts: 0 Private Messages mwiseman
ActorTom wrote:IS THIS ANY WAY TO RUN A CONTEST?????


This is a contest?