Jason Toon

quality posts: 19 Private Messages Jason Toon

Today I'm proud to break the next Internet star right here on the Woot blog, and even prouder that he's from my old neighborhood in St. Louis.

I knew this guy as the security guard at our local supermarket - as you'll soon see, he's got the kind of look you notice. All the while, a whole different group of St. Louisans knew him as a karaoke star. This video features almost no singing, but once you get a load of him in action, you'll understand his burgeoning fame. Ladies and gentleman, give it up for John G.

"Beyond the limits of imaginability" indeed! John G's towering presence may remind you of Lurch, but there's no lurching in his slick MJ moves. If I were a Hollywood producer, I'd figure out a way - any way - to get this guy dancing in my next picture. Welcome to the big time, John G! Don't forget the little people at the Loughborough Schnuck's!

(Thanks for the link, Andy S.!)


Quality Posts


quality posts: 0 Private Messages megakilroy

Definitely an "upper level plateau of greatness". I will strive to make it there someday from my "lower level plateau of mediocrity".


quality posts: 0 Private Messages susani8

Okay, I'll bite, how tall is he? It never says... I wonder if that higher plateau will include dental care? Enjoyed the vid, thanks guys!


quality posts: 2 Private Messages rickseiden

He's got far better dance moves than I'll ever have (or want for that matter).

He comes across as a pretty smart, and normal guy. To bad life dealt him the height and looks it did, as they don't do him justice. Well, the looks at least. At first glance, I was expecting him to be not too bright. I didn't think Susan Boyle could sing, either.

Don't judge a book by it's cover.


quality posts: 3 Private Messages hayesjc

That must have been some tough neighborhood in St. Louis:
"I knew this guy as the security guard at our local supermarket"

Here's hoping it was more of a nodding acquaintance than personal interaction of a professional nature.....


quality posts: 2 Private Messages klozitshoper

Well, he sure can move. Probably does not have enough money for a partial plate which he really needs. Gotta give him credit. He looks to be about 6'9" - maybe was a basketball player and that's the dental problem.


quality posts: 1 Private Messages silversalute

I'm getting scared to look anything "interesting" on the woot! blog. It's like choosing to watch a car wreck... Put a PayPal link up front so I can choose not to watch such stuff... Makes me feel like I need to take a shower... unclean...tainted...like Billie Jean... ew


quality posts: 0 Private Messages OhioJoe2

What, no moonwalk? I saw him start to do something similar, but never did it. I learned it when I was 14, I'm 40 now. if he doesn't know it, I could teach him, it's easy. And the length of his legs would make it awesome.

As an aside, though, I get so frustrated at camera operators who focus on the FEET when someone is doing the moonwalk (sitcomes, movies, not just home videos). The illusion is in the LEGS passing each other at the knees, not the FEET. The feet are what caused the legs/knees to move past each other in the same way they would if someone was walking forward, while the whole body is moving backward. Our minds expect to see the body moving forward since the legs/knees are moving that way. Thus, the illusion.


quality posts: 0 Private Messages deniset

Does anyone know what other family link Jason has to this venue?


quality posts: 0 Private Messages nyname

ok...so being a huge MJ fan..this by no way does justice for him except for the fact he also is an MJ fan!Way to stiff..Mj was smooth and could carry those moves as though it was a natural movement for himself..this guy is as though he is scared to twist turn jump..and even Moonwalk!!sorry dude all i can say is thanks for loving Mj but need to watch somemore videos to teach you the real moves!

Jason Toon

quality posts: 19 Private Messages Jason Toon
deniset wrote:Does anyone know what other family link Jason has to this venue?

Hi Mom! Yes, my parents used to run karaoke in that very room, Talayna's Jukebox on Hampton Avenue in St. Louis. The mirrors and the neon look even crazier in person.


quality posts: 0 Private Messages meiam

He sounds like Nicholas Cage. Fairly smooth dancer for being so tall. Not so sure about the singing voice....really didn't hear that much of it.


quality posts: 0 Private Messages ryleyinstl

Wow! I used to live in Dogtown near this place. While the neighborhood is fine (historic), this establishment looked abandoned to me and has absolutely no appeal from the outside. In fact they advertise having the "Worlds Greatest Pizza," which they proudly wrote in sharpie on the side of the building.


quality posts: 0 Private Messages eagledrew05

as soon as i saw "security guard at our local supermarket" and "looks like lurch" in the email i knew exactly who you were talking about. never would have guessed that that fella had those moves.