Ahhhh Big o' Cosmos

df19808 wrote:How many people, including myself, will woot get fired today?

I am constantly trying to make myself big enough to cover my computer screen so that people walking by have a harder time seeing it.. ha

AnotherBrian wrote:Regarding the game.
It's a neat idea and I liked the art style and inside jokes/references. I think it's a good idea that unfortunately trips over it's own operculum on execution. It could work except for a few problems.

1) No pause button? Especially when you move automatically to the next level. Also, it doesn't hurt to have a volume slider instead of just a mute button.

2) Bad hit boxes on the enemies. The SNES needed rectangular hit boxes, with Flesh on my 3 GHz quad core, I think we can handle detecting sprite contours.

3) Package trajectory. On the first and second levels the angle of the little cannon doesn't match the angle of the shot.

4) The game lags sometimes when a static and moving enemy are on the screen at the same time. (Refer to point 2 above).

5) Frequent double blocking.

Number 5 is the big one. It's called a game breaking problem. It really makes me think you made this game for the lulz or never actually tested it. Sure it's easy to randomly spawn enemies but it's completely possible to add some math that would ensure a clear, if difficult, path. Making the player's speed fixed actully makes this easier. (And kudos for the tweak to side scroller genre that I have not run across before. It nicely increases the tension nearing the end of the level.)

But to continue...
If I fail because I screwed up it's ok, I don't feel cheated because I made the mistake and I have gained motivation to do it better the next time. I when I fail because the game made it impossible I get irritated, and worse, I feel nothing when I succeed because it wasn't really my skill that did it. This is worse than playing F5 roulette at midnight because at least I understand that that is luck. I'm not irritated when I don't win that 'game'. I, and it seem many others, never took the time write lengthy and highly insightful critiques your load balancing systems.

I won't address the problems some have had of winning the game, and then being unable make a purchase because of your bandwidth issues. I never made it passed level 4 because of the double blocking problem. BTW, the first time this hit me was a few seconds into level 1. That right there is half the reason I probably spent more time on this post than the game. (I think I played for half an hour).

Once aging, if these problem were fixed I would have thought it was a great bit of April Fooling and something you might think about doing for all the BOCs.

I'm hoping I don't come off as too much of an ass, a little bit, but not too much.

I agree #5 is a big frigin issue...

It is probably a waste of time; I don't have any luck when everything comes at me in pairs on both lanes!

Thewacokid wrote:You've got to be frickin' kidding me. Level 7?


Sometimes I really really hate Woot. This is definitely one of those times. I like challenges. I don't like nearly impossible challenges based purely on random warpin' luck.

I agree !!! The admins at Woot are having a laugh at the Wooters expense ! See yall later

got mine!

endel3 wrote:Yeah, this is effin' stoopid--I spend like an hour, then finally in the forever level 4 and still doing fine and it just kicks me back to level 1 for nothing.....I may just stop wooting after this one....

Getting kicked back to level 1 means you're on level 5.

Woot is evil. LOL

I have a feeling that everyone at Woot is cracking up at all the pissed off comments.

Ah well; Woot, I'll check back in with you later to see if there's anything worth buying. But for now, this is a waste of my time.

beerslayer1 wrote:Ok, can't get to level 7...I guess you guys don't need the money. Glad someone is doing well in this economy!

Don't need the money? I am sure the $3 will bankrupt them

Dissonance wrote:I like to NOT throw packages at the little houses. Sometimes I'll lob one at a really big house or farm, but I don't aim. When I see a tiny house that looks pitiful and desperate I can't help but giggle as I act like I'm going to throw one and then don't.

It makes me feel like I actually work for Woot!

Ah, a post that actually made me LOL. Good work!

levichar wrote:I don't understand, I reached Level 9 and clicked on the button to get my random Big Orphaned Cetacea...it took me back to the main page, so I clicked on the "I want one" button and it put me in the game again. So I was eligible, but it didn't let me get one. Grrrr..

I read on here that you have to play the game again, and just crash on anything and it should allow you to purchase

I also beat the game far enough that it offered me a chance to buy a Big o' Cosmos and when I clicked the button, it just opened woot.com in a new page. Is this not Firefox 4 compatible?

btls64 wrote:the bag is a lie!!
the bag is a lie!!
the bag is a lie!!
the bag is a lie!!
the bag is a lie!!
help

There is no cake !!
There is no cake !!
There is no cake !!
There is no cake !!

Kudos to Woot for a great prank. But if this is real, then its pathetic. I can get better crap going to the local dump with out this headache.

I would love a Big Orphaned Cetacea, I've never gotten one before. But can't really play this game at work. Thanks for the tease.

Mr3dPHD wrote:This seems impossible, but it really isn't. I think the further you get in the game, the less of a chance you'll get "double road-blocked". I got screwed several times on LV 1 & 2, then all of a sudden I made it all the way to LV10! Big o' Cosmos, here I come!!!!

By the way, when you beat LV4 it warpes you back to LV1....but it counts it as LV5, so just keep going. Once you beat LV3 for the second time, you will be able to buy your crap.

http://img189.imageshack.us/img189/1179/wootx.jpg

I got to level 7 and it had the button to order but it just opened a new page and when clicked to order it just opened the game again, did yours work?

I feel Jatravartid...LOL

I finally got my Big Orphaned Cetacea!

Last night I beat level 3, in round 3, 3 times. I got an error message each time. I should have gotten crap! Oh well. Good luck to all you Sirius GPP fools who waste their day trying to get past this random number generator. May your crap be worth more than your time.

Dulanic wrote:And it is woot's fault that you bought the restricted phone of crap?

no i bought a top rated phone, but woot should cater to all forms of "crap" to maximize profit you would think. Its all about the $ at the end of the day for them.

Wootalyzer's Pricing Post! - The price of today's woot item is saved here for future reference
------------------------------------------------------------
Random Crap - Level 8
$3.00 + $5 Shipping
Condition: Crappy

*DISCLAIMER* Wootalyzer! is in no way affiliated with Woot!, and this post may not always be here!

I have now tried 4 different browsers, the game does not load on any..

I FIGURED OUT HOW TO GET PASSED TWO OBJECTS COMING AT ONCE!

BOOYAH! *happy dance*

SOrry for screaming!

So, is the April Fool's idea that we get to play these games and ACTUALLY buy a Big Orphaned Cetacea, or is it that we try to play these games and then CAN'T buy a Big Orphaned Cetacea? I actually made it to the point where it said you have the "privilege" of buying a Big Orphaned Cetacea and the button lit up, but it just reloads the game when I click I Want One.

Screw you woot. I'm sick of this crap having two objects on the screen at once. It is not possible to win in this scenario. SO NOT WORTH IT. You have lost my business for today, if not longer just out of principal for the aggravation

Games actually not bad for a Flesh type game (or something like that I suppose).

However, having it randomly become impossible is just bad design. It's not cool, neat, or tricky to dole out frustration to your customers by giving them an impossible task.

All the game would need is the ability to slow down/speed up the snail/scrolling based on the unused left/right arrows.

Considering the ridiculous high scores, I am sure that there is some other hidden cheats (or controls).

But in the end, the effect is that your customers are are slowly starting to realize that your not laughing with them, but at them.

If this is anything like past woot April 1st insults, there is probably some way to score the Big o' Cosmos that has nothing to do with winning the game... Woot is probably just trying to fool, frustrate and implicitly ridicule it's customers for being loyal.

And I am sure Woot will teach them a lesson and they will eventually stop that loyal behavior.

As the saying goes: "Be careful what you wish for".

I smite you Woot!

georgefe wrote:I can't believe so many people are pissed. I hope they are kidding. Its a Jatravartid game. I couldn't get past level 3. Its nothing to get overly upset about and leave woot forver ???

Yes it is!Vogonity Bag!!We rely on woot to offer us at least one thing a day. All they offered today fuel to piss people off. Look at the # of bad comments! How would you like to go to the gas pump today and some Vogonity Bag decided you had to play a game first in orser to get gas? Hmmmmmmmmm Think I'll buy my gas SOMEWHERE ELSE! One Sale a Day will get my daily shot from now on! Sorry I called you a Vogonity Bag! Vogonity Bag!!

this is Lamuellan. there's nothing you can do when the moving blockades meet the stationary blockades.

Nevermind was going to say the bar never moves but clearly it does...

Still, random and frustration is not fun nor a joke. The "joke" at the end of the day (if this is possible to win at all) better be that the bag o crap is really a bag of super awesome really expensive stuff...

Level 8? I cant beat level 3.

https://sslkids.woot.com/wantone/ae51a8dc-0910-445e-823e-182cda3c6d4d/random-crap-30 works now, quickly!!!

Ouch. Good luck, all ye hunters o'crappers. Eight levels may just drive ye mad.

What a waste of time.

Huh. I played and finally died. It said I hit level 8. I was presented with the message, 'You've "won" the "privilege" of buying some crap. "Congratulations".' So, I clicked on button to buy bag o crap and just got the woot home page where my only option is to start the game again. April fool's on me. The bag is a lie.

skagasz wrote:The system changed a few years back - now you automatically get three by buying "1". There's no longer the option to select a quantity.

More proof that in the past six years I have never been able to purchase a Balrog Of Craziness.

How are you people beating this? I have yet to die based on anything other than luck. Got as far as 6 and haven't come close since then.

I literally died right away because the game decided to start off with a double obstacle.

Can we say Bunch of Crybabies ?

Get over it people, Woot does not "owe" you anything. If you haven't figured it out by now, they don't exactly follow the "customer is always right" motto.

After I realized the game was random and it wasn't worth the time, I realized it was April Fool's day; then I actually laughed out loud, felt kinda dumb and moved on. You should do the same.

If you happen to only have one arm, that is unfortunate; but please trust me, the game is not worth your time.

So was this fail or was this fail?

Great...now thanks to Woot, On Black Friday next Novermber, Wal-Mart will have carnival games set up at the door. You have to beat the rigged challenges to get inside. Sorry for the people with disabilities, you won't even have a remote chance. Everyone else - how long can you suffer frustration to prove your "worth". Absurd and CWOT