WootBot


quality posts: 14 Private Messages WootBot

Staff

We here at Woot are no strangers to the joys of cleaning and displaying various animal pieces in your home, so we can appreciate the enthusiasm some people have for taxidermy. After all, it's an art, and it's a way to commemorate and memorialize your triumphant kill, a favorite pet, or maybe just that thing you thought was a Chupacabra in your yard. Of course in every profession there is an upper echelon, but Terrible Taxidermy focuses on one of those lower echelons. Way lower...

 

Screen shot 2011-08-03 at 12.13.06 PM
"We'll put it behind some shrubs. No one will notice."

 

Hey, we get it. Taxidermy's hard. It's an art form, and it takes a lot of practice. For all we know every taxidermist has a shed full of these "learning experiences." But we have to wonder how many of these were the equivalent of a living room tattoo: "Hey, I got a buddy that can probably do that for you, and CHEAP." 

Screen shot 2011-08-03 at 12.12.19 PM
"Jake, we're out of bear teeth-" "JUST SLAP SOMETHING IN THERE! What's the difference?!"


Did people pay for these? Did they receive the finished work and do anything other than scream and hurl it out the nearest window? Or was it more like when you open your Christmas presents to discover some @$%hole bought you socks again, when you have to fake a smile and say something about how nice it is and how much you appreciate the thought? We may never know. 

Screen shot 2011-08-03 at 12.12.43 PM
"There I was, rifle in hand, when the leopard came over the crest of the hill. I'll never forget the look on his face."


Take a trip down the worst attempts to capture the majesty of nature, but before you feel bad for the horribly defaced animals contained therein, just know that it could be worse: we could be looking at Pathetic Plastic Surgery.

Screen shot 2011-08-03 at 12.12.31 PM
The Bobcat is by far the most flamboyant and sassy of cats.

 

 

BJGumby


quality posts: 3 Private Messages BJGumby

That first picture is a half-ass job.

matthew


quality posts: 20 Private Messages matthew

HEYYOOOO

taternuggets


quality posts: 22 Private Messages taternuggets

I can't get past Chompers.


Nothing follows.

wisesage


quality posts: 3 Private Messages wisesage

My father-in-law's father was a hobby taxidermist many, many years ago. One day he was showing off his hobby to the neighbors who had expressed some interest in seeing his work. Suddenly, the neighbor lady screamed "THAT'S MY CAT!" I never did get a straight answer if he had killed the cat himself, or if he just happened to find it dead and decided that it would look great on his wall.

sometimes i like to put on the cape and scream like a monkey.

taternuggets


quality posts: 22 Private Messages taternuggets
wisesage wrote:My father-in-law's father was a hobby taxidermist many, many years ago. One day he was showing off his hobby to the neighbors who had expressed some interest in seeing his work. Suddenly, the neighbor lady screamed "THAT'S MY CAT!" I never did get a straight answer if he had killed the cat himself, or if he just happened to find it dead and decided that it would look great on his wall.



Ouch.


Nothing follows.

llandar


quality posts: 32 Private Messages llandar
wisesage wrote:My father-in-law's father was a hobby taxidermist many, many years ago. One day he was showing off his hobby to the neighbors who had expressed some interest in seeing his work. Suddenly, the neighbor lady screamed "THAT'S MY CAT!" I never did get a straight answer if he had killed the cat himself, or if he just happened to find it dead and decided that it would look great on his wall.



Could've been worse. She could've screamed "THAT'S MY CAT!" as he served it for dinner.

thatheard


quality posts: 6 Private Messages thatheard

"The Bobcat is by far the most flamboyant and sassy of cats."

So *that's* the cougar that everyone's been telling me to watch out for in our local bars...

klozitshoper


quality posts: 2 Private Messages klozitshoper
BJGumby wrote:That first picture is a half-ass job.



Now that's a quality post!

ActorTom


quality posts: 2 Private Messages ActorTom

35 years ago one of my friends was taking a TAXIDERMY CLASS, and another friend of mine liked to hunt. My hunting friend payed our taxidermy student friend a highly discounted fee to have some ducks mounter. They looked great, and he hung them on the wall behind his parents' bar.
A few days later, it was another friend's 18th birthday (you could drink at 18 in most states back then), and we were celebrating at the bar. As we were sitting there drinking, maggots began to drop from the birds onto the bar.