quality posts: 16 Private Messages WootBot


The email servers have been down all day.
And though they will return eftsoon, know this:
If your message is not writ in meter,
It shall in outbox idly wait and sit.

Only emails of a certain nature,
Shall through our IT's wall of fire traverse.
And people: please, I am not your mother
Determine for yourself the correct verse.

Of war and a man I sing: no good.
I took the one less traveled by: almost.
I saw the best minds of my gen-: too much.
You blocks, you stones, you worse than senseless things!

Do not -- do NOT believe that I enjoy this.
Hot brands do scald my gut with every line.
But the interests of the office must trump
Desire to hide my muse, and passions fine.

O folks, come on, this ain't rocket science.
Do not respond with any abstract poem,
But in our august literary past
Find the correct meter. * WORK NOT FROM HOME * 


Photo from Flickr user Torkildr under the auspices of the Creative Commons License

Photo from Flickr user Torkildr under the auspices of the Creative Commons License.


quality posts: 18 Private Messages DaveInSoCal

Oh woot why force this hideous meter,
And beget this miserable malaise?
Bad poetry has such great potential,
To return us all to woot's darkest days.

Yet here we have abominable verse,
With each line getting progressively worse.
The only light shining here in the dark,
Is this crappy poem, written for a lark.


quality posts: 4 Private Messages rdzek

The Woot writer writes
Asunder wit is rendered
A tear strikes terra


quality posts: 14 Private Messages Jessara

Though here we sit with broken hearts
Because no crayfish came our way,
The Crashing Cloud's a minor part:
Catastrophes now rule Woot's Day.


quality posts: 8 Private Messages jcolag

Building iambs in fives with halves of rhymes,
Is prosody Greek and not computer.
Why guys of IT might install the thing,
It must offend both Iambe and Wooter.

Yet e'en in quote announcement fair warn with
An errant syllable show 'ther and yon.
Which shows the server's not yet quite debugged.
Lies, truths, IT's a mess: Please fire them gone!

Shakespeare wrote parts in prose and limericks should
Be as valid as this may be, yet no
Nantucket man nor haiku Nipponese
May work. Not even freestyle rap, yo?