WootBot


quality posts: 15 Private Messages WootBot

Staff


You want to reward your employees for their hard work with a special lunch. So, you think, “I’ll hire a caterer.” But here’s the thing: caterers cost money. And remember the old saying goes, “You gotta spend money to make money,” not “You gotta spend money to have other people make food for you.” So how do you make put together a special lunch without spending money? You call it a potluck! 

Now, you’re probably thinking, isn’t potlucking the thing they do in the Olympics where someone tries to throw a big rock further than the other guy? Actually, that’s shot-putting. But don’t be embarrassed; I get those two confused all the time myself. A potluck is when everyone at your workplace brings in some food and you all share it, buffet style.

But as with everything, you can’t just leave it completely open or else it’ll just be chaos. No, you need to set some guidelines for what your employees can and can’t bring. And to help you come up with your own, I’ve decided to share the ones we use here at the Sean Adams University of Business Management Development Leadership.

You are NOT allowed to bring any of the following to SAUBMDL potluck:

  • Tortilla chips with more than 3 sharp edge (play it safe; just get the round kind)
  • Anything that “jiggles” for more than 13 seconds after it is placed on the table
  • Anything that looks crispy but is actually soft
  • Conceptual dishes
  • Any dish whose title rhymes with “low rate of attrition” (let’s keep it positive)
  • Fortune tomatoes (tomatoes with fortunes inserted into them)
  • Anything referred to as “barbecued” simply because it has barbecue sauce on it
  • Un-grilled grilled-cheese sandwiches
  • Shrimp with “greedy tails” (tails that take a good chunk of shrimp meat with them when you pull them off)
  • Fortune cucumbers (like fortune tomatoes, but cucumbers instead)
  • Screwdrivers in hotdog buns
  • Any dish that camouflages itself to a table cloth
  • Donuts where you can’t see through the holes
  • Any dish that requires a post-it indicating that it is “edible”
  • Fortune radishes (You understand by now)

Like I said, those are the rules we use here at Sean U. What do you hate to see at potlucks?

Gatzby


quality posts: 43 Private Messages Gatzby

Savory dishes containing apples or raisins are right now.

Did you know shirt.woot ships internationally? Get you some!
Why do my posts always get deleted? -- Noise Reduction -- Try it in podcast format.
No, you can't have our iPod, keys, or Lego. Sorry.

drdoug99


quality posts: 0 Private Messages drdoug99

LOL, shrimp with "greedy tails"....I love that one....it's a pain then because you kind of have to squeeze the tail to get the rest of the meat.

fortune vegetables, LOL

tanios


quality posts: 12 Private Messages tanios

Can someone name a dish that rhymes with "low rate of attrition"? I'm really trying but I have no clue.

Gatzby wrote:Savory dishes containing apples or raisins are right now.



nparus


quality posts: 1 Private Messages nparus

co-workers are what I least like to see at pot lucks.

Moony

maxrfb


quality posts: 8 Private Messages maxrfb

The coworkers that bug me are the ones that sign up for items such as, 2 liter bottles of soda (or pop depending on where you are reader), package of rolls.
Basically any store bought pseudo-side dish that they don't even bother to repackage.
It cheapens the hard work we who cook put into it.

Oh, and another item that should be banned is the "Chicken with snot" that often seems to rear its ugly head.

wow. I actually bought a Robot Elvis.
What was I thinking?

eviloverlord333


quality posts: 2 Private Messages eviloverlord333

Can't we just ban the non-contributing co-worker. We have potlucks at my work all the time and we have a co-worker that NEVER contributes ANYTHING and yet he still sits down and eats with us EVERY time we have a potluck.

Can you tell I am a little disgruntled with this guy? It is not that he doesn't have the money, as he makes more than anyone else in the company except the owner and he is single with no family to support.

nparus


quality posts: 1 Private Messages nparus
maxrfb wrote:The coworkers that bug me are the ones that sign up for items such as, 2 liter bottles of soda (or pop depending on where you are reader), package of rolls.
Basically any store bought pseudo-side dish that they don't even bother to repackage.
It cheapens the hard work we who cook put into it.

Oh, and another item that should be banned is the "Chicken with snot" that often seems to rear its ugly head.



I'm afraid to ask what chicken with snot...wait, nevermind. I think I just got that and need to go now. I think that's next to unidentified lumps in mayonnaise soup and unknown green dip in bread bowls.

Moony

abitterwoman


quality posts: 27 Private Messages abitterwoman

Lol I also enjoyed the "shrimp with greedy tails." Does this count for lobsters with greedy tails and crabs with greedy legs as well? Though I don't suppose anyone would bring those to a potluck..unless it was in my dreams

"Computers don't make errors. What they do, they do on purpose."

Moueska


quality posts: 54 Private Messages Moueska
tanios wrote:Can someone name a dish that rhymes with "low rate of attrition"? I'm really trying but I have no clue.



Marmalade et Couq Au Vin,

Cake as deadly as sin,

Dough made of wheat - rolled thin!

Bowl of shredded wheat - with skim!

Okay, now I give up.

Moueska


quality posts: 54 Private Messages Moueska

At my job, pot-lucks are boring. WE have a dessert swap. As in, I bring Milk and Tea, and one big cake. Everyone else brings a sweet with enough portions to share.

We have enough leftovers for stragglers and those who couldn't make it.

... Works every time.

jabeights


quality posts: 0 Private Messages jabeights

The guy who never brings anything to a potluck, shows up to eat and then during clean-up, grabs a brown bag to fill up with leftovers to take home, his home. If there are two brown bags available, even better, for him.