WootBot


quality posts: 14 Private Messages WootBot

Staff

It seems like I face some new, frustrating dilemma almost every day. For a while, I tried to solve each one on my own, but I just can't do it anymore. I'm in over my head, and I need your help, Wooters! So, each week, I'm going to post a problem that I'm facing and you're going to help me solve it. But here's the catch: the solutions need to be puns. That's right: logic is secondary; puns are the primary goal here. I'll choose the best pun and announce it in next week's post.

THIS WEEK'S EPISODE: The Woot Shot!

Okay, so this week, I'm not EXACTLY looking for puns. Here's the deal. During NBA basketball games, they'll have replays and graphics and whatnot. Well some of them are sponsored - like the Mazda Drive of the Game, or the KFC Bucket Chart - and that got me thinking: Woot should sponsor one. BUT WHAT WOULD WOOT SPONSOR?! Here are some example ideas:

  • The Woot Deal of the Day (best trade/free-agent signing)
  • The Woot Basket of Crap (the shot that shouldn't have gone in)
  • The Woot Washed-Up-Old-Player-Who-Was-Good-Until-Amazon-Bought-Him of The Game (self-explanatory)
     

But you can do better than that. You can help me. So, go ahead: post your ideas for a Woot-Sponsored replay or graphic in the comments.

Last week's winner (Thanksgiving motivational speech title): How to Skin Hens and Influence Peafowl from user SQUIDTODE[something].

Other Favorites: Be a First Class-eh-role Model from fgarriel; Don't just wishbone - make it happen from lipophilia; and In order to succeed you have to give a pluck from radi0j0hn.

Photo by Steve A Johnson used under a Creative Commons License.

jpherrell


quality posts: 0 Private Messages jpherrell

Woot Steal of the Game (best defensive steal)

Woot special delivery (best lay-up or dunk)

Woot off (worst air ball)

leatherwing


quality posts: 1 Private Messages leatherwing

Woot Screaming Monkey - Best court-side performance by a coach

Debunker - best dunk (BeDunker?)

Woot Off - worst screwup

midka89


quality posts: 0 Private Messages midka89

"Woot's Deal Of The Day" sounds good but I'd do it as the best *Non-Star* player's performance.

Like when some smuck that sits the bench randomly scores a ton... now that's a deal!

cutumderecho


quality posts: 0 Private Messages cutumderecho

"Alley-Woot of the game"

Displays teamwork and the ability to share the ball (products for woot in this case) within a split second time frame (woot's timed deals day) that leads to an alley-oop.

lroux


quality posts: 2 Private Messages lroux

Woot Off Player of the Game (for the player who comes in for a few minutes and is taken out immediately)

Woot Off Killer Useless Time out of the Game (for those useless end-of game time outs that make the game just drag on and on - but allow me a chance to go to the bathroom)

But I think the Screaming Monkey's flung into the crowd at half time would be a much better idea. Forget the beach balls! and PLEASE, forget "the wave". Lets fling Monkeys around the crowd!



EssenGrabow


quality posts: 3 Private Messages EssenGrabow

The Woot Basket of Crap!!

For the biggest show of getting to the basket and the ball not actually going IN the basket

jcolag


quality posts: 8 Private Messages jcolag

Quality Plays: The moves--ideally earlier in the game--that show what the game is about. During the commercials, some players are obligated to beg for them from people who don't seem to have any power over the process.

BVZKELBVTT!: A quasi-secretive version of the sport run parallel to the normal games, that are kind of like a pickup game that lasts until the last player leaves or someone loses the ball.

Alternatively, just slap exclamation points at the end of small nouns. Ball! Shoe! Fan!

lipophilia


quality posts: 11 Private Messages lipophilia

Best Overtime Clutch (shot)

lipophilia


quality posts: 11 Private Messages lipophilia

Biggest Overhand Catapult

sprkmaker


quality posts: 4 Private Messages sprkmaker

Each of your sites can sponsor something!

Wine Woot of the game- biggest basketball flopper

tech woot foul- technical foul

home woot run - yep, that's an easy one

sports woot page - newspaper add (do they make newspapers anymore?)

kids wootball - volley ball for kids add (hit with your wrist)...maybe not

shirt woot and skins - back yard football billboard.

sellout woot crowd of 9! - elevator soccer....you can probably use another sport for this as well....

deals woot - poker, i guess.



and last but not least, for all of woot!

wooterpolo championships 2013!

itsatrap1


quality posts: 0 Private Messages itsatrap1

If you have a lock and or key related item, "Ten seconds in the key" is a good one.

anything gardening related (or self help) would fall under Goal Tending.

The Double Dribble! Two bags of crap for the price of three!

jsh139


quality posts: 13 Private Messages jsh139

Woot's up?
Woot's going on?
Woot's Shakin'?
Woot's Cookin'?

For hot deals or recent happenings around the site. You get the idea...

Insert signature here.

manders001


quality posts: 0 Private Messages manders001

Where's the Fruitcake? shot of the day, (WOOT The Heck) or what ever word you war to use for the "H".

joshaw


quality posts: 24 Private Messages joshaw

The Woot 2-For-Tuesday double bonus, of course.

Scootergptx


quality posts: 1 Private Messages Scootergptx

Moofi - Best shot to go in the wrong basket.

Finally, the quest for Babies on Cribs is over. Next quest, Babies on Cribs II.

SQUITODEATHPILLS


quality posts: 1 Private Messages SQUITODEATHPILLS

Woot Quality Post-up. (best back to the basket move of the game).

winefarm


quality posts: 7 Private Messages winefarm
SQUITODEATHPILLS wrote:Woot Quality Post-up. (best back to the basket move of the game).



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