theguruguys


quality posts: 276 Private Messages theguruguys

I am so happy the World didn't end, if it would have ended I would have not been able to get my Christmas 2012 Big ol' Celebration.

"But Bags of Crap have not been sold in a long time", you say?

"What is this big woot! box doing on my porch, I didn't order anything!", I said.

After opening the box and searching though all the glorius crap, I found a letter:

Colonel Crap wrote:Dear Loyal Particiapnt or Participants, theguruguys? Are you plural? Singular? Are you an exceptionally rich white white man strapped to the back of Rosie Grier?

Whatever you are, theguruguys, you've impressed us. And at least of you has earned himself a B. O. C.

Please, if there's more than one of you, try to share, okay? We can't just send a bunch in case your actually twenty or thirty guys. What if your just one? How would we look then?

In future, consider making your name more clear. But thank you deeply for what you do in the forums. You, however many of you there are, are appreciated.

Stand Fast!

Colonel Crap





To Answer Mr. Crap, I mean Colonel Crap's question, there is only one of me at the moment. The Guru Guys is the name of my business. While I have had employees in the past, it has mainly just been just me doing IT consultation in the Houston area for over ten years now.

So why not just use 'theguruguy' without the plural, it would make more sense? Well when I started my web page, back in 2003, theguruguy was already taken. Even more frustrating was that theguruguy was taken on a few forums that I was active on so I used theguruguys when creating accounts on those forums. When I came to woot! I didn't think I'd be participating in the forums much and many of the items I initially ordered were for the business, so for the sake of keeping it easy for me to remember my user name on all the forums I kept it theguruguys. As as side effect (or clever marketing?), when you searched google for theguruguys my web page appeared, when you search for theguruguy my web page didn't appear (at the time, it does now). So that is why I am plural, but not (Much like ThunderThighS... then again maybe both her Thighs do the typing?

Oh yeah, the Big ol' Celebration! It was my best one yet as far as items I can actually use, usually I give away most of the crap. It contained:


  • Kelty Redwing 44 Cobalt Camping Backpack
  • 2012 Woot Calendar (just in time! ;)
  • xTreme 6' HDMI Cable
  • "?" Woot paper bag!
  • Total Care Toothbrush - 2 pack
  • Mush 2 Womens Flip Flops
  • Roommates Halloween Peel and Stickers
  • Callaway Pink Collar Shirt 2Xl!
  • Woooooooooooooooooooooot! cape Screaming Monkey
  • Elemental Eatery Woot shirt (XL - My Size ;)
  • Green woot! shirt Small
  • Alarm Clock Snooze shirt (XL)
  • Green Woot Monkey Shirt (2XL)
  • Hare riding Turtle Shirt (XL)
  • Shirt.woot shirt
  • The Legendary Big ol' Celebration Green woot! beverage coozie
  • Columbia River Knife & Tool
  • Hand written woot! letter from Colonel Crap
  • 24x Texas Air which, after a job well done, were freed into their natural habitat!



Thanks a lot woot for the surprise Christmas gift. I am happy to accept the recognition, but more importantly I hope that sharing the knowledge I have, much of it gained by the efforts of others sharing their knowledge on similar forums, is used by wooter's in making educated purchasing decisions here and abroad!

Merry Christmas to all!

-Brian

Moueska


quality posts: 54 Private Messages Moueska

Congrats on the WootLoot! Maybe you'll get featured in their "Wooters @ Home" blog!

:D

ThunderThighs


quality posts: 605 Private Messages ThunderThighs

Staff




Thanks TGG for all you do in the forums. You're a five-star wooter.




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lichme


quality posts: 3125 Private Messages lichme

Got a similar package delivered today, was quite surprised.


  • Kelty Redwing 44 Cobalt Camping Backpack
  • Purple Velvety Stocking With "S" on it
  • 2012 Woot Calendar
  • "?" Woot paper bag!
  • Reach Total Care Toothbrush - 2 pack
  • Weight Watchers Cook Book
  • Perfect Cereal Bowl
  • UltraZ license plate
  • Green woot! shirt Small (s)
  • Shirt.woot shirt (size 12)
  • The Legendary Big ol' Celebration Green woot! beverage coozie
  • Combination Stapler, Tape Dispensor, and Clock
  • Nook Cover
  • 32x Texas Air which




I looked, could not find a letter, so unsure if this came from ColonelCrap or another Woot God, but thanks! Happy Holidays!

bsmith1


quality posts: 106 Private Messages bsmith1

Well, thanks for rubbing it in our faces, you lucky SOBs...

thumperchick


quality posts: 248 Private Messages thumperchick

Yep, I too was blessed with awesome surprise Bunch of Cheer from the Colonel!

Contents:
Letter from @ColonelCrap
Sound ID six Bluetooth Heasdset
Jingle bell reindeer antlers
Legendary Big ol' Celebration coozie
2012 Woot! Calendar
Teva Mush flip flops (size women's 7)
2 pack toothbrushes
HDMI cable
Paper '?' bag
Flying monkey with WoooooOOOOOOooooot cape & mask
Kelty backpack
19 bags of Texas air
Jeep comfy cart & high chair cover
Shirts:
The Elemental Eatery (Anvil MXL)
Green 'Woot!' (AA WS)
Happy Birthday to Us Shirt.Woot (AA kid's 12)
United Tastes of America (AA MM)
AND!
A Screaming Monkey Shirt, with metallic ink on AA, Men's Medium - with instructions on how to make it a cape.





theguruguys


quality posts: 276 Private Messages theguruguys
lichme wrote:
I looked, could not find a letter, so unsure if this came from ColonelCrap or another Woot God, but thanks! Happy Holidays!



I couldn't find a letter initially either, it was hidden somehow - but it appeared in a standard white envelope - I think it fell loose from between some Texas air as I found it on the floor when cleaning up the crap-pile.

bluejester


quality posts: 569 Private Messages bluejester

I got one! I am a bit too sick to post up pics right now, but hopefully soon. This was definitely an awesome and unexpected boon to receive. Thanks Colonel Crap! May your monkeys ever scream like the souls of the damned being stretched over the racks of Hades!

baybei


quality posts: 49 Private Messages baybei

Aw, you guys are lucky! Nothing for me, but hey...it is what it is yah? Looks like you guys got some nice hauls though. Enjoy!

lichme


quality posts: 3125 Private Messages lichme
theguruguys wrote:I couldn't find a letter initially either, it was hidden somehow - but it appeared in a standard white envelope - I think it fell loose from between some Texas air as I found it on the floor when cleaning up the crap-pile.



Judging by the size of the envelope, it is very possible it could have fallen out of my box, as both the top and the bottom flaps had openings where the tape wasn't making contact with the box. I gotta stop trying to find it lol, driving me nuts.

CowboyDann


quality posts: 716 Private Messages CowboyDann

Sorry it took me so long to post pictures, Went for a quick stop at my parents house before going out to eat and was surprised by this box and took a quick open.

Here are some pictures.






I'm pretty sure @Slydon helped out ColCrap with some ideas for the letter but it was a very nice surprise to find. Thanks a lot woot you're all the best, The letter will be framed and hanged alongside my letter for buying a boatload in a wootoff haha.

At ease CowboyDann
You've done great things this year Soldier And I don't mean your 587 or so quality posts. I mean your really great record collection. Did you get the new Scott Walker?
Pretty amazing right?
Anyways, if you can take the time out of your busy schedule to stop listening to Swans and that weird French prog record, please find yourself this sweet Boards of Canada album. WAIT... you've got all of the Boards of CAnada records? Well, then, we're including a different Bunch of Cheer for you to enjoy. You've earned it, soldier. Hope you love it as much as you love Modest Mouse.
Keep up the fine work in 2013.
STAND FAST!
Colonel Crap


That's the letter.

I got:
A pair of flip flops,
bacon lovers gift box,
motorolla bluetooth headphones,
iPod speaker dock,
Caesers cologne,
fannypack it seems,
A sleeping bag methinks (didn't open it)
red Kelty backpack
Periodic table of food shirt,
Woot monkey cape shirt (don't have the heart to cut it)
Kids shirt.woot shirt.
Womens small woot shirt (someone knows I'm trying to lose weight ;))
Question mark bag
Big ol' Celebration koozie
2 toothbrushers
New style woot monkey
~9 bags of texas air
and a 2012 calendar.

Oh oh and my woot hoodie I'm wearing now. I've never seen a yellow logo one so I'll keep thinking it's specially made for me until you tell me otherwise. Fits perfectly though <3

Thanks again woot, this is the bestest :3

One more picture,

viewing image source should get bigger pictures if you want to try and read anything in the pictures.

Moueska


quality posts: 54 Private Messages Moueska
bluejester wrote:I got one! I am a bit too sick to post up pics right now, but hopefully soon. This was definitely an awesome and unexpected boon to receive. Thanks Colonel Crap! May your monkeys ever scream like the souls of the damned being stretched over the racks of Hades!



The suspense is terrible... I hope it'll last.

/WONKA

;D

Srsly, though, get well soon, and post pics if/when you feel well enough to post them! My curiosity's already got the better of me. XD

CowboyDann


quality posts: 716 Private Messages CowboyDann
Moueska wrote:The suspense is terrible... I hope it'll last.

/WONKA

;D

Srsly, though, get well soon, and post pics if/when you feel well enough to post them! My curiosity's already got the better of me. XD



I too am curious :3

thumperchick


quality posts: 248 Private Messages thumperchick
CowboyDann wrote:
Oh oh and my woot hoodie I'm wearing now. I've never seen a yellow logo one so I'll keep thinking it's specially made for me until you tell me otherwise. Fits perfectly though <3



*pop* I have the blue zip-up hoodie w/yellow woot logo. Sorry buddy.

But hey, BACON!

neuropsychosocial


quality posts: 171 Private Messages neuropsychosocial
thumperchick wrote:*pop* I have the blue zip-up hoodie w/yellow woot logo.

Narfcake and I also received them; entertainingly, I was sent a large hoodie and Narf was sent a small.

Did anyone receive a medium who would prefer a large?

RIP A.A. Blanks (Obituary)

ThunderThighs


quality posts: 605 Private Messages ThunderThighs

Staff

neuropsychosocial wrote:Narfcake and I also received them; entertainingly, I was sent a large hoodie and Narf was sent a small.

Did anyone receive a medium who would prefer a large?



You must post pictures!




FORUM MODERATOR
To contact Customer Service, use the SUPPORT form at the top of every woot page
••• ► Woot's Return Policy ◄ ••• ► Did you check your spam/junk folders for a CS reply?
CANCEL?? How to cancel your order in the first 15 minutes!! - except orders with Woot-Off or expedited items

CowboyDann


quality posts: 716 Private Messages CowboyDann
thumperchick wrote:*pop* I have the blue zip-up hoodie w/yellow woot logo. Sorry buddy.

But hey, BACON!



I too have one in blue. But this is dark grey . And its more of a cheesit orange maybeh. I don't mind sharing with narf and neuro. They are both standup alkstars. My hoodie was a perfect fit for me so im content <3

ThunderThighs


quality posts: 605 Private Messages ThunderThighs

Staff

CowboyDann wrote:I too have one in blue. But this is dark grey . And its more of a cheesit orange maybeh. I don't mind sharing with narf and neuro. They are both standup alkstars. My hoodie was a perfect fit for me so im content <3



Is it an XL because I lost mine somewhere and I kinda think I left it at the office. Would be just like the Colonel to throw it into a box. Would have a worn feel to it though. And maybe long blondish hair on it.




FORUM MODERATOR
To contact Customer Service, use the SUPPORT form at the top of every woot page
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Slydon


quality posts: 18 Private Messages Slydon

Staff

CowboyDann wrote:I'm pretty sure @Slydon helped out ColCrap with some ideas for the letter



LOOK MAYBE A LOT OF PEOPLE LIKE FRENCH PROGRESSIVE ROCK AND SCOTT WALKER OKAY

Hi, I'm one of the writers. My powers are limited but I'll do what I can.

Gatzby


quality posts: 43 Private Messages Gatzby
Slydon wrote:LOOK MAYBE A LOT OF PEOPLE LIKE FRENCH PROGRESSIVE ROCK AND SCOTT WALKER OKAY



DOZENS!

Did you know shirt.woot ships internationally? Get you some!
Why do my posts always get deleted? -- Noise Reduction -- Try it in podcast format.
No, you can't have our iPod, keys, or Lego. Sorry.

joshbeu


quality posts: 0 Private Messages joshbeu

Don't get me wrong... I still want a chance to get a Bunch of Cheer of my own the old-fashioned way, but I'm impressed with this. Super classy, Woot!

Enjoy, all.

Josh

todaresq


quality posts: 75 Private Messages todaresq

Congrats to all you top posters!!! Cool to see these surprises jump out when you least expect em.

jlandrith


quality posts: 0 Private Messages jlandrith

COol

todaresq wrote:Congrats to all you top posters!!! Cool to see these surprises jump out when you least expect em.



-Jeff

DaveInSoCal


quality posts: 18 Private Messages DaveInSoCal

That's awesome. I like how the random Crap went back to being even more unexpected! Great job active forum participants, strange music lovers, and hoodie wearers! Merry Christmas!

And great job wootployees! You all are taking a hell of a beating on Facebook right now from a bunch of jerks, and you don't deserve it. Most of us think you're awesome, so keep fighting the good fight. Eat some fisted cake out of a jar and have a lovely day!


thumperchick


quality posts: 248 Private Messages thumperchick
CowboyDann wrote:I too have one in blue. But this is dark grey .



Oh! I thought your pic was blue. Well then my musically inclined friend, you and the other gentlemen DO have a special treat!

memnoch69


quality posts: 0 Private Messages memnoch69

I didn't realize until a few moments ago this happened. Woot, you have helped bring just a hope of light back into my darkened world. I see, that while this is different, it fits the tradition. Am I disappointed I was not included, absolutely. But I'm always disappointed when I don't get crap. That is part of the fun of the sack. So thank you all for restoring my hope in woot and humanity.

twitter is the dumbest F%#$ing thing that ever happened to the internet.

Moueska


quality posts: 54 Private Messages Moueska
memnoch69 wrote:I didn't realize until a few moments ago this happened. Woot, you have helped bring just a hope of light back into my darkened world. I see, that while this is different, it fits the tradition. Am I disappointed I was not included, absolutely. But I'm always disappointed when I don't get crap. That is part of the fun of the sack.


THIS.

Also:

BTW, each time my recap thread gets cited in the home.woot recap during woot-offs, I probably feel as glowy as getting one of these boxes of awesome. ^_^

Even when I grumble and carry on about missing plot bits, very sudden character typos (that change the character genders unexpectedly), and "wish lists"... I really love the home.woot stories.

And I'm a woman. ;) Just for future woot-off write-up purposes in the case I get blessed with being featured again.

neuropsychosocial


quality posts: 171 Private Messages neuropsychosocial
thumperchick wrote:Oh! I thought your pic was blue. Well then my musically inclined friend, you and the other gentlemen DO have a special treat!

Hey! I'm no gentleman.

RIP A.A. Blanks (Obituary)

jon98gn


quality posts: 26 Private Messages jon98gn

Congrats to the Bag o Crapocolypse getters. I was left off the list for being naughty and not having enough Dreidel.

Thunder Thighs you're looking fabulous as ever even though you've avoided any of the employee photo ops so far. And no I'm not working on getting on the Nice list for next year. wink wink.

\

thumperchick


quality posts: 248 Private Messages thumperchick
neuropsychosocial wrote:Hey! I'm no gentleman.



You, are correct and I knew that. Sorry about that.

Slydon


quality posts: 18 Private Messages Slydon

Staff

Moueska wrote:BTW, each time my recap thread gets cited in the home.woot recap during woot-offs, I probably feel as glowy as getting one of these boxes of awesome. ^_^



That still impresses me how well you've kept up with all the important stuff. Once or twice we've written something SPECIFICALLY because we think you'd enjoy it.

Hi, I'm one of the writers. My powers are limited but I'll do what I can.

LarryLars


quality posts: 65 Private Messages LarryLars

Congrats to all crap recipients!

Some of your stuff sure brings back memories when I was fortunate enough to buy them before they sold out; "Be The Screaming Monkey, a Woot Tee" (the green shirt), and "Happy Birthday to Us" (the white shirt). I also have the "?" Woot paper bag and the blue zip-up hoodie w/yellow woot logo!


!

Have you checked your Private Messages lately?

Moueska


quality posts: 54 Private Messages Moueska
Slydon wrote:That still impresses me how well you've kept up with all the important stuff. Once or twice we've written something SPECIFICALLY because we think you'd enjoy it.



/glow

:D

Thanks, Slydon. ^_^ BTW, Did you see that we managed to get a SECOND poster that is NOT me in the recap thread?! (Not to jinx things, of course.)

popojijo35


quality posts: 2 Private Messages popojijo35

That is awesome. Way to go woot!!!

cam1d2e3n4


quality posts: 1 Private Messages cam1d2e3n4

Definately a good thing for Woot to reward their loyal customers...just don't lose sight of the masses. I'm sure the regulars were all loyal to their Woolworths, Ames, G.C. Murphys, etc. But those stores didn't do anything to keep bringing back the other 99%. Where are they now... You have a niche that people are willing to pay for. And believe me, in the Bags I have bought, I can't think of ONE thing I would walk by in a store and put it into my cart. But it made me happy and I kept coming back...just saying.

camden

poostorm


quality posts: 0 Private Messages poostorm

Good job, Woot! I always felt there should have been some way to allow the super loyal Wooters and those that are active members of the Woot Community a chance for the Bunch of Cheer before anyone else.

Very nice!!

jon98gn


quality posts: 26 Private Messages jon98gn

Random question? But am I the only one who also thought that Colonel Crap retired to help run a Vermont Inn? Just curious because I swear he disappeared shortly after taking over command for ThreePieceWoot and went MIA after a few campaign missions.

\

sccrkeepr


quality posts: 1 Private Messages sccrkeepr

This is awesome news! Makes me want to participate in the forum more often. Thanks WOOT!/Col. Crap for rewarding the active/funny/friendly/ people, without whom we wouldnt have awesome information/insight on your products.

lstaff


quality posts: 202 Private Messages lstaff

I, too, was blessed by Colonel Crap!!!!

I will post pictures and list soon!!!!


Thank you, so much, Woot! for the wonderful surprise. You guys are THE BEST!!!!!!

whatsamattaU


quality posts: 1077 Private Messages whatsamattaU

Last one to the party as usual, don't have the time to take picture or figure everything out, but tried sending thanks to the Colonel directly and indirectly. This may work. My items (and I definitely was NOT expecting this Dec. 26--I should have gotten the hint when I saw TheGuruGuys post about this elsewhere, but it never clicked to look into this--TT had to point me here):

High Peak Siruis blue sleeping bag (I think that's the model)
Woot 2012 Calendar (the most prized of the gifts)
High Sierra backpack: black with yellow, silver, white colors mixed in (haven't figured out model)
Lone Star Beer flip-flops (size 13, but I might know someone that size)
Black Caped screaming monkey
Green woot monkey t-shirt (Large)
"The Legendary Big ol' Celebration" foam cup holder
Woot question mark paper bag
Fantastic Four Peel and Stick border (to put around the walls of a room--have to think on this one)
Kids size 8 "shirt.woot" shirt--again will have to think who could use it
Motorola headset (I'm guessing bluetooth)
2 Reach Total Care toothbrushes
Vibe II Recycled Pinon Green fanny pack
Reburb Naga Molten Gaming Mouse
Small Green Woot t-shirt
XL The Elemental Eatery T-shirt (and no blonde hair seen in case TT lost this shirt)
Medium Woot exclamation point (orange) dark gary long sleeve hoodie
The letter from the Colonel.

If I didn't have to get up in 5 hours and post one more entry before bed, I'd go into the letter more, but thanks again! Happy Holidays!