WootBot


quality posts: 15 Private Messages WootBot

Staff

Every week in this space, we’ll take a look at the news and offer our own incisive blend of commentary, analysis, and poop jokes. The news you need, from a voice you can trust, in the 90 seconds you have to spare: that’s Woot Weads the Wire.

NEW YORK (UPI) -- Digital game company Atari Inc. has filed for bankruptcy protection in New York, court papers show.

Company officials have already begun flashing as a sign they are temporarily invulnerable while they respawn.

 

Atari 2600 on my 42 inch plasma tv

 

ITHACA, N.Y. (UPI) -- Researchers in Ithaca, N.Y., say the world's largest library of wildlife sounds, including samples from 9,000 species, is digitized and fully available online.

Scientists say this library is currently THE most cutting-edge way to make your cat come running in from the other room.

PENDLETON, Ore. (UPI) -- Some residents of the Umatilla Indian Reservation in Oregon say they believe mysterious cries coming from a nearby swamp are being made by Bigfoot.

Experts say there's nothing to worry about and it was likely just Bigfoot learning that the Tooth Fairy wasn't real.

 

Bigfoot Sighting

 

MOSCOW (UPI) -- A bison that died at a Russian wildlife reserve was apparently done in by a drug overdose, the necropsy report said.

A hastily-assembled tribute album, consisting of nothing but bison calls, has already reached number one on iTunes.

FRANKFURT, Germany (UPI) -- How Germany plans to move 700 tons of gold from New York and Paris to Frankfurt is none of your business, a bank spokesman said.

Etiquette experts say your proper response is to say "Well, I never!" and grab your handbag as you storm from the room.

Atari 2600 on my 42 inch plasma tv from jeffisageek and Bigfoot Sighting from JD Hancock are used under a Creative Commons License.

jcolag


quality posts: 8 Private Messages jcolag
FRANKFURT, Germany (UPI) -- How Germany plans to move 700 tons of gold from New York and Paris to Frankfurt is none of your business, a bank spokesman said.



See, I would have gone for making it someone's business. It seems like trying to move gold like you move dorm furniture (give some athletic guys a twenty and a case of beer for the favor) is asking for trouble.

But hey, the guys from Atari need to do something before the unemployment checks start rolling in, I guess.

orionfike


quality posts: 0 Private Messages orionfike

What do you mean the Tooth Fairy isn't real?