Son, because of my experiments with the 3M MPro120 PocketProjector, there’s a chance… well, I might not be there for you all the time.

It’s not personal son, it’s just that… see, the 3M MPro120 PocketProjector is like an orange. If you look at the outside, it looks really good, but then you cut it open and find that inside, inside there’s so much more. There’s a whole world of… seeds and… juice… you know what, maybe this is a bad example. Here, let me just use the 3M MPro120 PocketProjector to demonstrate what I’m talking about.

See? That photo on the wall explains it all, doesn’t it? I keep it on my computer at all times. Well, yes, it is a cat with a word balloon that reads “The 3M MPro120 PocketProjector is kewl” but that’s just how life is in the digital world these days. I guess I could use Rick Astley if you’d prefer… okay, cool, we’ll stay with the cat. But you understand now? The 3M MPro120 PocketProjector is a way to transfer the digital world into the real world. It’s handheld and works with most computers, and with an extra cable (not included) you can use it with MP3 players or smartphones or even digital cameras. There are built-in speakers and even a little tripod so you can show your photos and videos on the wall, just like I’m doing now. Careful! Don’t get too close! I don’t want you to fall in! The digital world is dangerous, and you might never escape. And did you know that, when using the 3M MPro120 PocketProjector, time goes one hundred times faster than normal? Oh, hang on, maybe I’m wrong about that. Yeah, yeah, I am wrong, my watch was just fast. Guess there’s nothing you and I can’t beat together, huh, boy? Father and son, reunited at last!

Anyway, Daddy spends a lot of time using his 3M MPro120 PocketProjector these days and… well, I guess it’s hard for you to fully understand what I’m saying. These concepts are so advanced… hey, what about this? The 3M MPro120 PocketProjector is like a gateway to another world. Yeah, that’s better, a gateway. Do you know what gateways are? Have they taught you that in school?

Hey, hey, no need to get defensive! I was just asking because I remember skipping a whole bunch of classes when I was your age. College isn’t just about the books, you know. Man, this one time I got totally blitzed and went to see this movie called TRON, you ever heard of that? Crazy stuff! Anyway, Daddy loves you, even when he’s busy with his 3M MPro120 PocketProjector.

Oh, you just wanted to borrow fifty bucks for beer money and the new Daft Punk CD? Heh, just like your old man. I used to listen to Wendy Carlos every day back at ol’ State U. Hey, tell you what, here’s a hundred. G’wan, take it, get outta here and have a little fun. And before I forget, if I ever get trapped in the 3M MPro120 PocketProjector by a photo of myself who wants to take over the world, avenge me, okay?

Atta boy. I knew I could count on you.

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