Somewhere in Park Slope right now…

Okay, so, the other dhay I was getting my coffhay at this bodega near my flat, and I saw Ashlhay! And I said, “Hey, Ashlhay, want some coffhay?” but Ashlhay didn’t shay hay, she just kept walking past mhay! And so I grabbed my iPhone and called Tiffanhay and said “Tiffanhay, Ashlhay just snubbed mhay at coffhay!” and Tiffanhay said “Brandhay! I’m worrhayed! Ashlhay told mhay that she was going out todhay and buying a Memorex MMP8585C 4GB MP3 Video Photo Player!”

And I said “Reallhay? Ashlhay mhay have a whay to plhay an mpthray that isn’t trendhay?” and Tiffanhay said “Reallhay, okhay?” And then we Twittered about it and linked to the Twitter on our Facebooks.

But while I was drinking my coffhay, I started thinking about the whay society corrals us dhay to dhay. Like, people sometimes shay that me and Tiffanhay are aphids! No, wait, that’s not the word. Vapid, they shay. And that has mhay wondering why. I mean, is it because of the iPhones? Are they judging mhay because of how good I seem to bhay?

Anywhay, I looked into the Memorex MMP8585C 4GB MP3 Video Photo Player to see if Ashlhay was making a mistake. First of all, it’s got 4 gigs of memorhay, and that’s pretty good, you know, for regular people. At least it's not one of those 2 gig ones. I mean, when you’re on the subwhay, not that I ever am, unless I’m going to Conhay for the ironhay, you don’t need to be watching a feature film on your little screen. Oh, yeah, the Memorex MMP8585C 4GB MP3 Video Photo Player does video and music. MPEG-4, WMhay, MPthray, you can take your entertainment with you whenever you want.

I guess that’s what Ashlhay was doing because I saw her a few hours later at a clothing store, you know, behind a displhay. I went right up and said “Ashlhay, what are you doing, acting like you’re an employhay? Where’s your iPhone?” And guess what Ashlhay said back to mhay? Ashlhay said she was there that dhay earning her phay and had been working since Mhay! And she’d left her phone at home! Well, I called Tiffanhay and to see what she’d shay and she said “No whay!” and I said it was crazhay! I mean, who’d want a Memorex MMP8585C 4GB MP3 Video Photo Player instead of an iPhone? Why wouldn’t Ashlhay want to take calls from me and Tiffanhay throughout the dhay in every whay? And most important, is there some new place where she’s getting her coffhay?

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