Guest Writer V

Seeking mystery? Whimsy? Wonder? It's a lot to ask of a toothbrush.

Look, the Woot writers are human, okay? Sometimes we run out of ideas. That's why, from time to time, we'll farm out the product writeup to an MFA student. Hey, if it worked for James Frey, it can work for us, right? So, today's writeup for this Panasonic Rechargeable Sonic Toothbrush is written by Thea Shea-Lea, an MFA candidate at Harvard Agricultural College in Cambridge, Nebraska:

The tale of how Chrysantha Jiffey came to inhabit the role of proprietress of the Scarlet Snapdragon Hostelry was scarcely a thing that could be told, so deeply were its roots gnarled and squished into the earthy Georgia loam, like the fist of a tree-like baby clutching fiercely its pacifier of dirt. Such soil yields not its enigmata gently.

But when the tart-tongued ladies of Junction Corners puckered their painted lips and spun the legend like a diaphanous web extruding from a brown recluse's anus, they located the first stop of destiny's tramway at the moment Virgil Jiffey - he who was called Pop - spied the Panasonic Rechargeable Sonic Toothbrush poised in the window of Beauregard's Mercantile at the corner of Earle and Water Streets one luminous downtown Sunday.

To hear him tell it that night at dinner with great roaring chuckles of laughter, Pop Jiffey had been struck by a revelation Damascene in its awesomeness. "Button," he bellowed (for such he called Chrysantha when deep in his drunken cups of alcohol), "I know things been awful poorly for us since Mama run off with that fancy-dude rhinoceros trainer. But it's all looking up now, I'll warrant. This toothbrush does 28,500 brushstrokes per second! I say 60 minutes of usage on a 12-hour charge, I say!

"Why, if it don't remove plaque the way Sherman's Army scoured the very soul of Dixie from our sacred soil, I'll crawl into a skunk's burrow 'neath a shapely magnolia and there die the unmourned death of a cur!" With a humongous clatter of oaths, Pop Jiffey vowed right there at table to acquire that Panasonic Rechargeable Sonic Toothbrush the very moment Beauregard's Mercantile opened for custom the next morn.

But come cock-crow, Pop Jiffey dozed in a bourbon slumber. By the time he'd roused his corpulent corpus from his feather-bed and maundered to Beauregard's, the Panasonic Rechargeable Sonic Toothbrush had been sold, Beauregard said, to a piano player on the railway. So he bought his daughter a hotel instead, and everybody was super folksy and whimsical in ways too varied and numerous to recount, especially while a deadline was approaching.

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Features

  • Panasonic Sonic Vibration Toothbrush with its linear motor offers up to 28,500 brushstrokes per minute for effective plaque removal
  • Brush timer pauses every 30 seconds and twice every 2 minutes which is the recommended total brushing time
  • Two brush modes regular and soft
  • A soft vibrations setting is offered for gentle brushing between teeth and gums
  • Soft start function - toothbrush powers on using gentle vibrations for 2 seconds, before reaching normal speed
  • The triple-edged brush design is for areas between teeth and gums and the surface of teeth
  • 100% waterproof construction
  • The included charger has an illuminated display which indicated battery life and it also acts as a holder for storage of additional brush heads
  • Rechargeable toothbrush runs for 60 minutes on a 12 hour charge
  • Includes 4 brush heads with different color bands

Shipping Note: Eligible for shipping to all 50 states

Warranty:  2 Years Panasonic

Specs

Specifications
Dimensions:
  • Toothbrush ~ 1" W x 1.1" L x 6.5" H (9" with brush head)
  • Charging Base: L 2" x W 3" x H 1.75"
Weight: 4.4 ounce
Charger Voltage: 100-240V 50-60Hz
Cord Length: 50"
Rechargeable Internal Battery: DC 3.6V Lithium-Ion

In the Box:

(1) Panasonic EW-DL90QW Rechargeable Sonic Vibration Toothbrush includes:

  • (1) Rechargable Toothbrush
  • (1) Charger
  • (4) Brush Heads

Sales Stats

Speed to First Woot:
6m 9.006s
First Sucker:
whitecottonball
Last Wooter to Woot:
faustust

Purchaser Experience

  • 9% first woot
  • 7% second woot
  • 26% < 10 woots
  • 24% < 25 woots
  • 35% ≥ 25 woots

Purchaser Seniority

  • 6% joined today
  • 1% one week old
  • 1% one month old
  • 12% one year old
  • 80% > one year old

Quantity Breakdown

  • 88% bought 1
  • 11% bought 2
  • 1% bought 3

Percentage of Sales Per Hour

3%
2%
1%
1%
1%
2%
4%
6%
10%
11%
10%
6%
6%
6%
5%
4%
3%
3%
3%
2%
3%
2%
4%
2%
12 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11

Woots by State

zero wooters wootinglots of wooters wooting

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Panasonic Rechargable Sonic Toothbrush
$69.99 Sold Out Health & Beauty
$69.99 USD false 1 Retail EA
1 3
Woot! Woot
4121 International Pkwy Carollton TX 75007 U.S.A.