I just want a mouse that lets me forget about the soul-crushing monotony of my job for just the briefest of moments.

Yeah, I get it. There are a lot of people out there who don’t have jobs right now and I should be plenty thankful for the one I have. And, deep down, I am. But when it comes right down to it, there is nothing exciting about spreadsheets. Absolutely nothing. The ability to create pie charts and bar graphs with just a click does not make it any easier to drag myself out of bed and get to the office, let me tell you.

But every morning when I start up my computer and my Razer TRON Gaming Mouse lights up with a cool “whooshing” sound, I get the tiniest little burst of inexplicable joy. In those few seconds, I feel like I’m about to do something important like save a civilization of virtual beings that live in the hidden world of computers or something. And the powering-down noise it makes when I shut off my computer for the night? Well that’s better than any “good job” comment I get from the boss. Not that I’ve ever gotten a comment like that, but still.

I know it’s got more buttons than I’ll ever need on it for data processing. Stuff like the 5600dpi Razer Precision 3.5G laser sensor, 1000Hz Ultrapolling and 1ms response time is completely lost on me. I’m sure somebody who’s lucky enough to play videogames all day can tell you more about that than I ever could. It doesn’t really matter to me. All I know is that the calming blue glow of that little mouse is sometimes the only thing keeping me from going insane with boredom and ending up unemployed. That alone is worth the price.

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