Swiss Legend Neptune Men's Watches

by wootbot

Storied Swiss

Watches, cheese, Federer? Switzerland knows how to do it! 

Gather round, one and all, and I shall recall for you the Swiss Legend of Neptune!

Once upon a time, in Switzerland, there was a farmers guy named Neptune, or Nep for short, or Ned for short and if you misheard. All day and all night, Neptune toiled away in his fields, harvesting the agricultural export that Switzerland is so well known for that me saying it here would be totally unnecessary.

One day, Neptune took a break and went to the tavern in town where all the other farmers were drinking traditional Swiss drinks and eating traditional Swiss foods. "Yo, straight up, I don't mean to offend anyone, but I totally farm harder than all y'all," said one of the farmers, except in another language because they were in Switzerland and maybe ancient times too.

"No way," said another farmer. "I'm, like, ALWAYS farming."

"Pfft!" said a third farmer. "The other day, my wife was all, 'when are you going to stop farming today?' And I was all like, 'Yo gurrl, when I stop farming, today will be tomorrow!' Feel me?"

"Silence," yelled Neptune. "Do the gods weave us from mortal string and wire so that we can argue? Nay! That is why I will build for ye, a device to settle this dispute with accuracy!"

And that's just what he did! He built this sporty, stylish timepiece with a dope stainless steel and rubber case and a totally ballin' textured rubber strap. And when he finished, he was about to bring all the famers together to give them watches so they could see how much time they each spent farming, but then he was like, "Wait, I should just sell these. I bet I could earn hella more skrilla than I do with my crops." Except he said the Swiss kind of money.

Well, he did just that: sold watches and got rich. And that, my friends, is the Swiss Legend of Neptune.