Woot Happy Hour: No, You Can’t Run A Tab

by Jason Toon

We’d love to have a drink with all of our Twitter followers after work, but we still haven’t found a bar big enough for 1.6 million people. So we’re showing the love the only way we know how: by selling even more cheap stuff. Introducing Woot Happy Hour. Every so often, after a particularly rough day on the job, we’ll whisk you away at 4 p.m. Central to a mini-Woot-Off that will last exactly one hour before it turns into a virtual pumpkin. But when, exactly?

There’s only one way to find out: follow @woot on Twitter. We’ll be announcing Happy Hour there and only there. Yes, we’ve finally discovered a compelling reason to join Twitter. Turn up your nose at your peril. While you’re sitting in splendid isolation on Superiority Island, the more pragmatic of your fellow wooters will be feasting on deals the likes of which you can scarcely imagine.

(Unless, of course, you can imagine a condensed Woot-Off without the Woot-Off killers.)

To further encourage the Twittification of America, Happy Hour sales will not be accompanied by the usual discussion forums. If you want to shoot your mouth off about a deal, tweet about it using the #woot hashtag. You can dive right into the flow of comments yourself, or wait for our forum moderators to scour these tweets for the best and most insightful. We’ll feature those on the front page of the sale a la our Quality Posts. But shorter. And faster. And with an extra helping of Web 2.0.

Woot Happy Hour is better than your regular old happy hour in one important way: it’s much less likely to lead to an awkward, regrettable make-out session with one of your co-workers. Wait, maybe that means it’s worse than your regular old happy hour.

Whatever the case, we hope to see you following our Twitter feed (@woot, remember?) and getting happy with us once or twice a week. Just do us a favor: if we get a little carried away, take away our car keys and call us a cab.