quality posts: 17 Private Messages WootBot


"A small amount of cocaine was found in a restricted area of the processing hangar for the shuttle Discovery, NASA said in a statement... the cocaine was found this week in a small bag on the floor near a bathroom in the restricted area." - CNN.com, "NASA finds cocaine in shuttle hangar", 1/15/2010

  1. Suspicious number of recent Space Shuttle flights to Bolivia.
  2. Mission Control keeps going to the toilet as a group.
  3. Where do you think the nickname "Buzz" came from?
  4. Space station radio transcripts include two straight hours of chatter about how beautiful everybody is, followed by three hours about how the Space Shuttle could totally kick Jupiter's ass.
  5. Mars Rover solar panel covered with white smears and razor marks.
  6. Planned lunar lander to be named after Fleetwood Mac's dealer.
  7. CIA now much more involved in funding of NASA missions.
  8. Last launch countdown: "10... 9... 8.. 7.. 6. 5. 4 3 21BLASTOFFOHMYGODTHATLOOKSSOAMAZING"
  9. Astronauts keep ducking into the Space Station "real quick," staying for 3 days.
  10. Constant giggling while bouncing around the "moon landing" movie set.
  11. We should have known those tiny spoons weren't for freeze-dried ice cream.
  12. You ever see how clean the inside of that Space Station is?
  13. Crew members radioed Mission Control about being "40,000 miles high" before shuttle had actually launched.
  14. Why else would you drive straight through from Texas to Florida wearing diapers?
  15. C'mon. They're shooting MONKEYS INTO SPACE.

How about you? You notice anything a little... weird about NASA lately?



quality posts: 0 Private Messages synack

Oh come on, you would shoot monkeys into space too if you had the option.


quality posts: 16 Private Messages Snapster
synack wrote:Oh come on, you would shoot monkeys into space too if you had the option.

heh, maybe the writing team is having a mcgwire moment. Video: Woot Monkeys in Space


quality posts: 2 Private Messages ActorTom

Top Five Signs Jason Toon is on Cocaine

1. Contest postings kept getting later and later, then stopped.

2. Contests results fell a week behind, got caught up, fell two weeks behind, got caught up, fell three weeks behind, then 4, 5, and more weeks behind.

3. Contest payments now $2,890.00 behind schedule.

4. No progress on any of the above, despite the fact that the CEO of his company is now involved and upset about the situation.

5. Lots of internal emails discussing acquisition of "white" or "glow in the dark" monkeys.


quality posts: 2 Private Messages ActorTom
synack wrote:Oh come on, you would shoot monkeys into space too if you had the option.

Mine will only fly about 30 feet. NASA's must have better surgical tubing.


quality posts: 0 Private Messages hjs521

C'mon, It should have been obvious. 18.7 billion dollar budget and no man on Mars yet? They've been spending that money on something...


quality posts: 5 Private Messages pmcizhere

That might explain why the Mars rovers lasted so much longer than expected - cocaine's a hell of a drug. Gives some people great stamina!

There are 10 types of people in this world: those who understand binary, and those who don't.


quality posts: 0 Private Messages FGraf

LOL,thanks I needed a good laugh, FYI i just retweeted (go figure)...I fallow just about every public and privately owned Space agency that exists...hopefully they will think it as funny as we did. thanks again.


quality posts: 56 Private Messages theoneill555

Wouldn't you have to be on drugs to try and blow up the moon?

That's O'neill with two L's *holds up three fingers*


quality posts: 4 Private Messages bleeps

SNL kinda stole #8 for the fake news last night...