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quality posts: 17 Private Messages WootBot


Every week in this space, we’ll take a look at the news and offer our own incisive blend of commentary, analysis, and poop jokes. The news you need, from a voice you can trust, in the 90 seconds you have to spare: that’s Woot Weads the Wire.

FORT LAUDERDALE, Fla. (UPI) -- A Florida artist behind a plan to float a giant alligator head down the Intracoastal Waterway said the project was delayed by construction issues.

Locals expect to see it later, not after a while.


Alligator Head


SIOUX FALLS, S.D., Nov. 29 (UPI) -- Former Republican South Dakota Gov. Mike Rounds has tossed his hat in the ring for a 2014 Senate bid.

His opponents are already asking: can South Dakota really trust a man without a hat?

WASHINGTON (UPI) -- The U.S. House and Senate released their calendars for the 113th Congress Friday.

The controversial cover features Harry Reid in body paint stretched over the hood of a sports car.



SOUTHWEST HARBOR, Maine (UPI) -- A Maine fisherman's wife said he is trying to find a plastic tub of scallop organs he placed in a car he mistakenly thought belonged to a graduate student.

Insiders say if they don't turn up soon, the scallops will have to cancel their annual Christmas recital.

VATICAN CITY (UPI) -- Pope Benedict XVI is set to open his own Twitter account, with his first tweet to be sent Dec. 12, the Vatican said Monday.

Even now the world waits breathlessly to find out who the Pope will follow first: Neil deGrasse Tyson or Die Antwoord.

Alligator head from Adam Baker is used under a Creative Commons License.


quality posts: 7 Private Messages DaLemming

Someone remind Mike Rounds that "any plan vere you lose your hat iz a bad plan"


quality posts: 2 Private Messages crankyassjess

Photo removed? Boooooo. Hissssssss!

I still remember my first flying monkey...


quality posts: 0 Private Messages wy1dsta1yn

Have no fear about the Scallop guts... They have been recovered.