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Because if you want to make ostrich pizza snacks, you'll have to start with the Internet.

Want to start a revolution? Want to master some delicious new food that soon will be in grocery stores worldwide? Yeah? Well, before you get there, you'll need to start in your own kitchen. Specifically, you'll need to make a lot of really bad food using weirdly modified recipes you find online. It's just part of the learning curve. Before you're a world-class chef, you're basically just a re-heater stumbling through all of human knowledge once again.

So turn to the greatest depository of human knowledge. Turn to the Internet! It's full of possibilities. You can make toast from sick online burns, you can make tacos entirely from flavored corn chips with a soft drink gravy, and you can also just order a pizza because you spent to much time reading TV Tropes for the eighth consecutive night in a row. That's what a laptop like this offers you. The knowledge that it's perfectly okay to walk away from other knowledge and head directly to trivial, made up details that pleases no one but the Internet itself. You might be surprised at just how powerful that way of life can be!

Also, spoiler: ostrich pizza is really not so good. That's the first secret you'll unlock if you try to be a chef. Just because it looks interesting on the menu, that doesn't guarantee it's gonna be delicious.

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