Woot® : One Day, One Deal™

It's fair to say people are more enlightened about species conservation today than back when we intentionally hunted "nuisance" animals into extinction. And there have been some restoration success stories. But in some places, things are actually getting worse. Climate change, habitat destruction, and poaching continue to threaten species around the world, from whales to polar bears. Just last year, the Eastern Lynx and Western Black Rhinoceros were declared extinct. Can you name these eight species that today we can only see through paintings, photos, and stuffed specimens?

Answers are here. Please post your guesses, speculations, or arguments below! But know this: the Trivial Eye is presented for public amusement and no prizes are offered other than that familiar feeling of aggravation that so much of your mind is occupied by useless trivia.

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Back On The Pull List

Some time later, at the long table within the Penthouse of Evil, members of the Chaos Conglomerate await a very special arrival…

The Yellow Detonator: All I’m saying is that, as the mirror version of The Ogre, one would assume you’d talk, you know, normally.

Nega-Ogre: RRWWWARRGMONNMO!

The Drunk Heckler: Hey. HEY! That didn’t make any schence! Whadda coupla of LOSCHERS! You both sch… sch… oh no…

Doctor Eclipse: Ugh, for Evil’s sake, will someone get Heckler some coffee or something? Huge Dictator, what is the meaning of all this? I could be plotting the demise of Sunboy and Moongirl this very moment!

The Cosmic Entity Known As Paul: FO REALZ I GOTZ SPACE-SLUGZ 2 DFEET U NO LOL

Day-Puritan: The heretic and the abomination have a point, foul as they may be. I have a Nightwitch to burn, good sir. I shant be kept from my divine destiny much longer.

Huge Dictator: All in good time, my villainous fiends. Once Aridus the Desiccator arrives, all shall be revealed. Ah, here he is now!

Aridus the Desiccator: Greetingssss, moissst onesssss. Ssssay hello to my good friend Hydronaut, Prime Minisssster of Atlantissss!.

Nega-Ogre: RAWROO?

The Yellow Detonator: Okay, see, now that I understood.

Doctor Eclipse: YOU WITHERING IDIOT! You’ve led a member of the Super League of Heroes right to us!

Huge Dictator: Has he? Despite that induction ceremony you may have seen on television, I assure you that Hydronaut is well under my control, especially with his precious underwater civilization currently being occupied by MY aquatic death robots. Isn’t that right, Prime Minister?

Hydronaut: You just remember the deal, Huge Dictator.

The Cosmic Entity Known As Paul: OMG WTH DEEL?

Huge Dictator: It was simple. I figured once Hydronaut here became a full-fledged Super League member, they’d put him on monitor duty, seeing as how aquatic powers don’t work so well on land. Once among all their computers, he downloaded the Super League Protocols, a set of files detailing how to defeat each and every member of their little group put together by The Retributator.

The Drunk Heckler: Schtupid paranoid freHIC… freHIC… looney! He’s not better than me. YOU THINK HE’S BETTER THAN ME?

Day-Puritan: Silence, drunkard! But how might this betrayer go about transporting such information? Foul magic?

Huge Dictator: No. He used the Centon 64GB USB Sport Drive I gave him. I trust the incredible storage size was more than enough for the files, yes?

The Yellow Detonator: Nonsense! They may be fools, but the Super League isn’t stupid. There’s no way they’d let him walk out of there with a flash drive like that.

Huge Dictator: They would if they didn’t know it was WATERPROOF, wouldn’t they, Hydronaut? Now hand it over.

Hydronaut: Take it. Now release my people at once!

Huge Dictator: Oh, come now, Prime Minister Hydronaut. Our little plan has only just begun, and Aridus has been so looking forward to spending some quality time with you.

Hydronaut: Bastard! Mark my words, I shall bring the power of the planet’s ocean down on your head for this!

Huge Dictator: I’m sure I’ll be shivering in my space boots aboard my moon base when that happens. Gentlemen, rough him up but be quick about it. We have much planning to do.

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There are plenty of places on Woot where you can find helpful information. This is not one of those places. Every week we will be comparing 3 pairs of things that shouldn’t be compared using this formula: Unrelated Thing X vs. Unrelated Thing Y in terms of Function Z. Facts will be misunderstood, overlooked, or changed for the sake of the argument. Enjoy.

1. A Blank Sheet of Loose Leaf Paper vs. Pyrotechnics in terms of What You Want in Your Mini Fridge

Pyrotechnics in a mini fridge? What a contrast, right? Something built out of heat and light inside of a cold, dark box. How poetic, don’t you think? Well, here’s the thing: poetry is expressed through words on paper, not fireworks in a fridge. You want to write about it? Fine. But don’t crowd up my mini fridge (small by definition) in the name of poetry and expect me not to complain.

Advantage:

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What more perfect luxury exists than collapsing on a beanbag chair? Haven't you always wished your iPad 2 or "new" iPad could enjoy the same pleasure? No? Well, now it can anyway.

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Maybe we should focus group this a little more.

Here’s a slogan for ya: it’s better than trash!

You spent what, $400 on that fancy iPad 2? Maybe you just plunked down $500 on one of those “The New iPads” everyone’s excited about. And yet what do you do when you’re trying to watch a movie on an airplane or play a late night game of Fruit Ninja in bed (that’s not a euphemism) and you don’t feel like holding it up? You prop it up on the nearest piece of trash or pair of wadded up socks you can find.

THAT’S how you treat your fancy high-end tablet that does everything? Come on now; you can do better than that.

That’s why you need something like this Beanpad for iPad 2 & Generation 3 “New” iPad!

(As an aside, screw you Apple. You couldn’t just call it the iPad 3? “The New iPad?” Seriously?)

Anyway, the point is you might look at this thing and chuckle and dismiss it as unnecessary junk (are you new here?), but if you’re going to spend money on a peripheral, it might as well be one that keeps your iPad 2 (seriously, don’t buy this if you’ve got a regular old Generation 1 iPad. It won’t fit) propped up, secure, reasonably safe against vibration, and not resting on a day old McDonald’s bag.

And hey, let’s not kid ourselves. You’re kind of lazy. It’s okay! So are we! Noone’s judging here. We’re just saying having a thing to prop your iPad 2 on is probably more exciting than having to hold the thing over your face in bed.

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Let’s have a moment of silence for one of the co-founders of modern flight: Wilbur Wright passed on to the great baggage claim in the sky exactly one hundred years ago this month. Poor Wilbur may have succumbed to typhus in 1912, but his invention, we will be reminded this month, lives on. May is also the month we commemorate paper airplanes (May 26 is National Paper Airplane Day!) and the beginning of the summer travel season (Memorial Day is the busiest flying weekend of the year so far). So come fly with Jeopardy! champ Ken Jennings as he debunks some commonly held—but thoroughly untrue—beliefs about airplanes and aviation. He’ll make sure your historical facts are in the upright and locked position, and that your scientific understanding is securely stowed in the overhead bins or under the seat in front of you.

Airplane Myth #3: "D. B. Cooper" Hijacked a Plane for Cash in 1971.

It was the day before Thanksgiving 1971 when a polite, nondescript, fortyish white man in a dark suit approached the Northwest Orient counter at Portland International Airport and booked a one-way ticket to Seattle. But immediately after takeoff, this forgettable man made more of an impression, telling the crew he had a bomb aboard and demanding $200,000 and four parachutes. The man got his cash and parachutes in Seattle and let the passengers go. But when the plane took off again, bound for Reno, the mystery man opened the commuter jet’s rear stairs and jumped out, about ten thousand feet over southwestern Washington. He was never seen again, making this one of the most famous unsolved crimes in history.

"D. B. Cooper," right? Wrong. The hijacker actually bought his ticket under the (no doubt false) name "Dan Cooper." So where did the made-up initials come from? The FBI began their investigation by looking into local Coopers, and there was indeed a D. B. Cooper with a minor Oregon police record. The real D. B. Cooper had nothing to do with the heist, of course—in fact, he was in jail at the time. But an inexperienced UPI reporter, up against a tight deadline, confused the two names and misreported the hijacker’s alias as "D. B. Cooper." Other news outlets ran with the error, and by the time it was discovered and corrected, the public had already latched on to the wrong name.

Dan (a.k.a. D. B.) Cooper is still a mystery man, more than forty years later. Some of the ransom cash was found near Vancouver, Washington in 1980, but Cooper is the only hijacker-for-cash in U.S. history whose identity is still unknown. The FBI feels pretty sure he never survived his risky parachute jump into fame, but they’d like to be sure. Those guys hate it when criminals disappear into—literally—thin air.

Quick Quiz: What TV series’ lead character was also named D. B. Cooper—specifically, Dale Bartholomew Cooper?

Ken Jennings is the author of Brainiac, Ken Jennings's Trivia Almanac, and Maphead. He's also the proud owner of an underwhelming Bag o' Crap. Follow him at ken-jennings.com or on Twitter as @KenJennings.

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 Wow. That's all we can really say. We got a special advance copy of Diablo III, the biggest game release in years, and put over 100 hours into it. And now, on the eve of its release, we're going to share with you some of our favorite updates to the classic point and click dungeon crawler. You've heard the leaks, the rumors, and the hints at what may be. But only read on if you're ready to find out just how amazing this game is. Here's our list of our favorite features from Diablo III:

• Intro cutscene plays out a 120 minute movie about the human condition and demands a small test on what you've watched as "copy protection."
• Deckard Cain no longer asks you to stay, implies maybe you should have visited once or twice in the last decade.
• New "Atheist" class allows you to smugly deny the existence of Diablo.
• Integrated Farmville support.
• Every tree is a unique NPC with a different side quest for the player.
• New product placement contract means Warriors class regenerates health with Mountain Dew powerups.
• Hip retro skins ($39.95 each) make the game look and play exactly like "Tapper."
• To reduce complaints of sexism, all "chicks in chainmail" will be portrayed as 65 years old.
• Players now capture and utilize small "pocket monsters" in their fight against evil.
• Hardcore duel mode replaced with "casual friendly" football simulation.
• Amazing final battle features incredible devil fiddlin' physics engine.
• "Epic Retro Edition" comes with 6,200 floppy diskettes and a map.
• Fully engaging dialogue choices determine what color tunic your character wears during the inevitably disappointing ending cut scene.
• Witch Doctor class is voiced by Morgan Freeman to give him some dignity.
• Newest "Darkest Circle of Hell" level pipes in audio from Xbox Live "Call of Duty" matches.

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In honor of your chance to "cover yourself" in our special music-themed Shirt.woot shirts, Scott's revisiting one of his favorite genres… the cover song! But today's got a twist. Today we're taking a look at those songs where the definitive version isn't the one by the original artist. Does that seem a little complex? Well, let us make it clear with our very first example:

Johnny Cash - Hurt

Without too much effort, you could probably convince a hardcore Nine Inch Nails fan that Johnny Cash wrote this classic, and that Trent Reznor's maybe NSFW original is the cover. In fact, the opposite is true! Thankfully it's no insult to lose a song to Johnny Cash, because Trent's never getting this one back.

Get the picture? After the jump, we'll be listing some songs where the cover wound up more famous than the original. If you know some of your own, why not throw them into the comments? This has the potential to create the GREATEST PLAYLIST EVER!!

And speaking of playlists, remember our Spotify playlist is up and running. Since last week's post was a tribute to the late, great MCA the comments were mostly reminiscing, and there weren't many links offered. So the theme of this week's mix is Kristy's Favorite Beastie Boys Songs and you know what? It's pretty darn good! After you listen you can catch her hanging out in our Turntable.fm room if you want to tell her that she rocks. But before you do any of that, check out this week's Music Monday selections inside! We'll be waiting for you after the jump…

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Carve Out Some Space

Great news, honey! Now that we’ve replaced our desktop PC, we can use the desk to display my collection of erotic woodcarvings!

I think my skills as a woodcarver, and as an artistic interpreter of sensual love, are finally ready to show the world. And just in time, too. Now that this Samsung Quad-Core Laptop has brought 4GB of DDR3 memory, an AMD A6-3420M quad-core processor, and a 500GB SATA hard drive together in a compact form factor, we can dump the clunky desktop PC and start really living.

And by “living”, I mean presenting my hedonistic sculpture in a manner worthy of its voluptuous allure. No more will my intensely lascivious basswood tableaux merely gather dust in a far corner of the basement. Now that our desktop PC is out of the way, visitors to our house can be stimulated by works like “Satyr Unbound!” and “Venus Reclining On A Camaro”.

I’m excited about the Samsung Quad-Core Laptop’s Windows 7 Home Premium, SuperMulti DVD±RW drive, and 15.6” display – but I’m even more excited about having room for a mini-gallery. You know I don’t do this for the money, but I wouldn’t be surprised if someone made me an offer for “Nymphs in the Garden of Ecstasy”. Maybe one of the ladies in your knitting circle. They seem to like arts and crafts.

Yes, as soon as I get this desk moved onto the front porch – oh, really? Where, then? I was thinking maybe living room, but – oh. Sure. Of course. The basement. Can I take the Samsung Quad-Core Laptop, at least?

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One day a year, we set aside a little time to express appreciation for a very special lady in our lives. Our CTO Luke Duff wields the crayons in this tribute to someone without whom we wouldn't even be here.