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HOW TO DRINK EGGNOG

by John Osebold

It's Christmas. Some people are merrying it up, some are very sad. So let's all enjoy a glass of eggnog to make us equally fat. First, we need to learn HOW TO DRINK EGGNOG​.

1. ok here we go, one carton for you, one for me

2. why aren't you drinking

3. holiday blues, eh

4. yeah I understand

5. here, just have a sip at least

6. I got us a bunch of dumb holiday movies too

7. hey, I know you had a tough year

8. but holidays are special because of who you're with

9. and I'd say your company makes this day extra special

10. how about that drink now

11. a toast: to you

12. now c'mon, these movies are gonna watch themselves