Thursday, July 19

Sean University: Read Em and Sleep!

by Sean Adams


 
What does it mean when your phone won’t turn on? It means you forgot to charge it and it ran out of battery power. Well, guess what? People are a lot like phones; they also need to be charged in order to work properly. But people and phones also have their differences too. For example, you can’t just plug people in to give them more energy (yet). Instead, they need sleep to recharge.


Also, when people are tired, the repercussions can be way more serious than when phones are tired. An over-tired phone just turns itself off. An over-tired person, on the other hand, forgets to turn stuff off, like the burner under the tea kettle, except he doesn’t have a tea kettle and what he thought was the burner is actually just a lamp, and so now, everyone at the tea party is going to be disappointed, or they would be if he remembered to invite them over. Also, how long has he been in in this tub and why didn’t he take off his hiking boots?

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Thursday, July 12

Sean University: The Heat Is On (in the natural way)!

by Sean Adams


 
Here at the Sean Adams University of Business Management Development Leadership, we specialize in preparing you for the world by giving you a hot degree. But that’s not just all! We also know a thing or two about living in a world of hot degrees, and not just the paper kind! The temperature kind too!

Degrees, in the temperature sense, represent how tall the red stuff (Mercury) gets inside a thermometer. Think about it this way: the hotter it gets, the closer Mercury wants to be to the ceiling fan. But hot weather isn’t all fun and growing. No, heat can be dangerous. That’s why you need to educate yourself, or better yet, let us educate yourself with these answers to frequently asked questions about heat!

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Thursday, July 05

Sean University: Put Your Leftover Fireworks To Work!

by Sean Adams


 
America celebrates its birthday like everyone else: with a party, a cake, and a special week on the Woot blog. Except instead of a cake made out of cake that you eat off a table, America’s cake, called fireworks, is made out of light and gets served in the sky. Which is dumb, because the ground-part of America is way more important than the sky part. But that’s beside the point.

What’s really important here is, like with normal birthday cake, there can be leftovers, but unlike with normal birthday cake, you can’t eat them. That’s why I’d like to use today’s summer elective course here at the Sean Adams University of Business Management Development Leadership to discuss what you can do with the fireworks you didn’t use on the 4th.

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Thursday, June 28

Sean University: Which art art thou?

by Sean Adams


 
It’s possible to sign your name on a receipt with a letter opener; you just need to dip in ink first. But is it ideal? No. You have to be really gentle or else you’ll end up tearing the receipt or damaging the surface underneath, and that’s if you manage to even take the thing out of your pocket without someone calling the police and saying, “There’s a crazy man with a dagger and it looks like he’s going to stab a barista!”

What’s my point? There are two: first, to explain the “scene” I caused at the coffee shop downstairs from the office; and second, to show that different situations call for different tools. And nowhere is this rule more important than in art.

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Thursday, June 21

Sean University: Don't be buggin' bout these bugs!

by Sean Adams


 
When I first announced we were going to do summer electives here at The Sean Adams University of Business Management Development Leadership, power commenter abitterwoman suggested a course on how to kill flies. But violence isn’t what I’d like to promote here. So, instead we’re going to use this space to talk about why you should be thankful for bugs. 

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Thursday, June 14

 

Thursday, June 07

 

Thursday, May 31