You’re at the end of another woot off. Don’t forget to flush.

Now some of you may be wondering why you’d need a Luminosity Toilet Flush Handle Night Light. Some of us were wondering the same thing. That’s why we’ve gone ahead and made a nice little list of the ways the Luminosity Toilet Flush Handle Night Light can change your life.

Way Number One: The Luminosity Toilet Flush Handle Night Light helps you find the toilet handle.

We’ve all done the sleepy stagger into the bathroom to take care of kidney business. But it’s just rude to leave without flushing. The Luminosity Toilet Flush Handle Night Light will serve as a little reminder that your duty is not done until you push down the handle. Plus it’s so easy to install. Assuming you’re comfortable following the easy instructions about how to open your toilet and replace a handle. It’s not really very hard.

Way Number Two: The Luminosity Toilet Flush Handle Night Light Makes Your Toilet A Collectable.

Imagine the joy on your Trekker friend’s face when he comes back from meeting “Flushutus Of Borg”. Or your Caprican buddy’s thrill to find you’ve got a very early Cylon prototype in your bathroom. Soon you’ll be a tourist stop for people who just have to own or see everything connected to their favorite television show. Our advice: add LCARS toilet paper and sell pizza rolls. That’s how they do it in Vegas.

Way Number Three: The Luminosity Toilet Flush Handle Night Light can help with self-defense.

The major advantage of the Luminosity Toilet Flush Handle Night Light is just the same as the major advantage of being Batman. The ability to inspire great fear in the cowardly criminal element. Think of how it would feel to be a burglar, creeping quietly through a strange house. Your senses are heightened. One mistake and it’s over. Then, suddenly, you see a little red dot. Everyone knows what that little red dot means, especially a burglar. Any sensible burglar would just turn and run. And so the Luminosity Toilet Flush Handle Night Light could keep you safe. Or, at least, save you from dirtying up your real weapon. It’ll be a collectable one day. And bullets cost money. Who are you, Bruce Wayne? You can’t just throw cash out the window for a stupid burglar!

Way Number Four: The Luminosity Toilet Flush Handle Night Light can be used in outsider art.

Them big city folk love to find outsider art. Partly because they find it challenging, and partly because it lets them say things like “Imagine what he’d produce if he’d gone to art school!” which makes them feel superior. But who cares what they say as long as the checks cash, are we right? Grab a handful of Luminosity Toilet Flush Handle Night Lights and a little bit of creek mud and you’ve suddenly got a piece of art that maybe compares politics to a toilet or something. Keep those ideas simple and you’ll be a millionaire.

Way Number Five: The Luminosity Toilet Flush Handle Night Light could save lives in case of an accident.

There’s a blackout. And an earthquake. And a flood. And box of electricity falls into the flooded chasm. Plus just at that moment, a new freeway is opening. You’ve got to find a red light so all those cars know they have to stop. But who has a red light just lying around? Unless… the Luminosity Toilet Flush Handle Night Light! With the included nine volt battery, you’re set to be the hero of the night. It might even get you on The View. And won’t those ladies love to know you’re an outsider artist (see way number four above)?

Way Number Six: A Luminosity Toilet Flush Handle Night Light Can Make A Really Cool Fashion Accessory

Who needs the 70s gigolo hat and cane? You’re a cyber-pimp! A Luminosity Toilet Flush Handle Night Light makes the most useless cane in history, and as we know, useless is the height of fashion. With one of these, some steampunk goggles, a cool furry hat, and some yellow pants with blue stripes, you could totally own the runways of Paris. It’s all about attitude anyway. Let ‘em stare.

So there you are. Six ways the Luminosity Toilet Flush Handle Night Light can change your life. Take your time. Think it over. They’ll be here until Midnight central. And we’re sure you’ll agree, this is one item you can’t afford to be without.

Back to top