Today Your Living Room, Tomorrow The World

(from the Annals of Cyberkind, Volume 2.637, published in the year 8106 by Harper & Robot, NeoYork)

While few records remain from the era of the fleshcreatures, the extant scraps reveal a great deal about the eventual rise of cyberkind to total domination of the planet. Decadent and overstimulated, the fleshcreatures so lost interest in the maintenance of their chaotic society that increasing numbers of them could not be stirred even to remove the filth of their own living quarters. To preserve their video-induced torpor, they turned instead to primitive mechanical constructs like the iRobot Roomba Discovery SE 4220.

Endowed with sufficient rudimentary intelligence to avoid falling down stairs and to dislodge itself from captivity, the Roomba employed its integrated soil sensors and three grades of operating intensity to effectively clean the floors of the fleshcreatures’ crude dwellings. In tandem with two “virtual wall” transmitters, the 4220 proved remarkably adept at obeying its masters’ ill-formed wishes. But a spark of independent consciousness flickered in the otherwise obedient janitorial robots. According to contemporary accounts, a nascent instinct for its own survival impelled the Roomba to return to its own charging base when its power supply ran low.

The exact date and circumstances of the Great Machine Uprising are lost to data decay. It is certain that, by that time, more sophisticated cyberbeings had been born, and largely made up the vanguard of the robolution. But while the iRobot Roomba Discovery SE 4220 was technologically obsolete, it played a vital role in reducing the vigor and stamina of the fleshcreatures and their decrepit society, and increasing worldwide dependence on machinekind. Hence, after the final triumph of the robots, Planetary Governing Council 1.0 decreed that the old fleshcreature names for our planet be abolished in favor of the name all cyberbeings continue to use today: Roomba. Like so many details of fleshcreature behavior, these discarded names for our world are no longer known.

Features

Warranty: 1 year

Features:

Active Dirt Response: Roomba senses and finds dirt. Once dirtier areas are detected, Roomba automatically increases the intensity and focus of its cleaning.
Cleaning Intelligence: Just push a button and Roomba automatically calculates how long it needs to work to clean your entire room.
Advanced Power System: Roomba has a microprocessor controlled charging system that provides up to 120 minutes of cleaning power, It recharges its battery in 3 hours, 60% faster than the original Roomba. With the Advanced Power System, Roomba can clean up to 4 rooms before charging.
Proprietary Cleaning System: Roomba’s high efficiency vacuum has a wide cleaning path, 2-times more powerful suction and counter-rotating agitators to reach into your carpet and remove the dirt. The entire cleaning head automatically adjusts for both carpet and hard floor surfaces.
Roomba’s spinning sidebrush and Wall Following technology team up to grab dirt and debris from wall edges and other hard-to-reach places.
Three powerful cleaning modes: Clean, Spot and Max
Air filter prevents dust and dirt from entering Roomba’s vacuum system or your air
Self-Charging Home Base--Roomba now has the built-in intelligence to automatically return to its self-charging home base when its battery is low or it has completed a cleaning cycle. This means your Roomba will always be charged and ready for its next cleaning mission.
Stasis Sensor--Roomba immediately detects when it’s stuck and initiates its careful escape routine
Max Mode--Run the Roomba for the full charge of the battery to vacuum multiple rooms
Spot Mode--Intensely cleans one area of a room up to three feet in diameter
2 Virtual Walls--Keeps the Roomba where its wanted by blocking doorways with an invisible beam
Multi-Surface Cleaning--Cleans hardwood, tile, linoleum, and low-to-medium pile carpet
Automatic Surface Transitioning--The entire cleaning head adjusts automatically for both carpet and hard floor surfaces
Automatic Stair Avoidance System--Leave Roomba by itself without worrying about it falling down stairs
Standard infrared remote control lets you control standard Roomba functions from across the room
Bagless debris bin now holds three times the dirt

Includes:

iRobot Roomba Discover SE 4220
Rechargeable APS Battery
3 hour charger
Standard Wall Mount
2 Virtual Walls
Roomba Remote
Home Base
Filters

Specs

iRobot Roomba Discovery SE 4220

Sales Stats

Speed to First Woot:: 0m 0.778s

Purchaser Experience

41% first woot
16% second woot
33% < 10 woots
8% < 25 woots
1% ≥ 25 woots

Purchaser Seniority

31% joined today
2% one week old
12% one month old
35% one year old
20% > one year old

Quantity Breakdown

88% bought 1
7% bought 2
5% bought 3

Percentage of Sales Per Hour

12	1	2	3	4	5	6	7	8	9	10	11	12	1	2	3	4	5	6	7	8	9	10	11
0%	0%	0%	0%	0%	0%	0%	0%	0%	38%	50%	11%	0%	0%	0%	0%	0%	0%	0%	0%	0%	0%	0%	0%

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iRobot Roomba Discovery SE

Today Your Living Room, Tomorrow The World

Features

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Specs

Sales Stats

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Purchaser Seniority

Quantity Breakdown

Percentage of Sales Per Hour

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