“Hi, Helen. Is Bob in there?”

“Mr. ParaUniversalLineBros is out of the office just now, Mr. Wellesburg. Can I help?”

“Maybe, Helen, Maybe. I’m looking for some information on a Philips Power Sentry Theatre Director.”

“Everybody’s talking about him these days, Mr. Wellesburg.”

“I understand he did a picture with you a few years ago.”

“Yes, sir, he was a dream to work with. He was always very stable when we needed battery backup during power outages, and was especially good with high performance home entertainment equipment.”

“That’s the kind of thing I like to hear.”

“Plus, and I don’t know if I should be telling you this, Mr. Wellsburg, but he had five NEMA 5-15P input connections and ten NEMA 5-15R Surge Protection output connections. I saw them all one night at one of Mr. ParaUniversalLineBros’ parties, when the bubbly really got flowing.”

“Helen, you devil! I promise that’s our secret.”

“Let me get his file for you. He’s also good with isolated noise filtering, voltage regulation, data line protection – he’s got an RJ-11 2-Way Modem/Fax/DSL splitter and a Co-axial Video/Cable protection battery – and he has an LCD display. Plus his recharge time is 90% in less than six hours. I’ve made you copies of everything.”

“Says here he even has a limited lifetime warranty through the manufacturer! Helen, you’re a miracle. This Philips Power Sentry Theatre Director fella sounds like exactly what I need to head up my all-lobster version of Cats. Tell Bob we’re still on for lunch tomorrow?”

“You’re already on the calendar, Mr. Wellesburg. And, Mr. Wellesburg?”

“Yes, Helen?”

“When you see that Philips Power Sentry Theatre Director… could you remind him what my phone number is?”

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