Security guards may not enter! This food court is liberated territory! ¡No pasaran! ¡No pasaran!

We, the patrons of the Glenwood Lakes Galleria, have occupied this food court out of solidarity with our oppressed brothyrs and systyrs at New York University. Just as the great struggles of the 19th century were waged in factories, so is the food court the crucible of 21st-century revolution. From the Sbarro to the Cold Stone Creamery, let freedom ring!

And here in my backpack, next to my anti-corporate water and my MacBook, lies the weapon of the people: the Skil Power Wrench. Liberated from power cables, it stands ready to dismantle anything from the KKKapitali$t system to your license plate frame. Instead of a wasteful excess of wrenches, ratchets, and screwdrivers strangling the life from Sister Earth, this compact, close-quarter device treads lightly upon the planet. The Skil Power Wrench puts Lithium-Ion power in the hands of the people. And does it comfortably.

In that spirit, we gather in this liberated space to use democratic process to arrive at a consensus about ways in which we’re going to use democratic process to liberate this space. Consensually, of course. I don’t know if you scumbag guards understand that, in your fascist green blazers, but we shall not be moved!

Hey! Excuse me! You may not come in here! You are on video! You are on video! Any attempt to move those recycling bins by force will be considered police brutality! Hey, gimme back that Skil Power Wrench! That belongs to the masses! Hey! Ow! Brutality! Brutality! Don’t wrench me, bro! The masses are calling Dad’s lawyer!

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