Now girls, I know Daddy said he would make you any Halloween costume you wanted, but there were some complications.

I know, I know. I got this Singer 5500 Fashion Mate Sewing Machine with Hard Cover for this exact reason. But, sewing is complicated. All of the Automatic Needle Threaders and Built-In Stitches in the world can’t help you if you really have no idea what you’re doing. Luckily, it came with a Machine Intro DVD, so I was able to make some costumes… just maybe not the exact ones you girls asked for.

Jenna, I know you wanted to be a “cowgirl princess,” but I couldn’t seem to get that one quite right, even with the Heavy Duty Metal Frame making for easy, skip-free sewing. However, I was able to make you the next best thing – a potato costume! Oh it might look like a big beige bag with eye holes, but trust me, everyone in kindergarten is going to go nuts over this spud-tastic outfit!

And Lisa, I wasn’t able to put together your “girl-ninja astronaut” suit. However, keeping with the theme of lunar travel, I was able to put together this moon costume. Sure, it might look like I just sewed together two white circles of cloth, but don’t concern yourself with Daddy’s process. Instead, look how even those stitches are thanks to the Singer’s Automatic Tension! If any of the other fourth graders make fun of you, just show them those! Not that anyone is going to make fun of you…

Now Amy, you said you wanted to go as “the undead corpse of your friendship with Zoe.” I’m sorry to hear the seventh grade has gotten off to a rough start, sweetie, but the good news is I’m pretty sure I got what you were thinking. Yes, it appears to be a hastily-made poncho thing at first, but really it’s symbolic! Like, these little holes. I wasn’t just testing out the Singer’s 6 Fully Automatic 1-Step Buttonholes. I was showing that Zoe punctured your friendship with her mean words. That’s also why it looks kind of torn there in the back. Not because Daddy got angry or anything.

Oh, and that reminds me: for Halloween, I’m going to be someone who doesn’t get yelled at by Mommy, and you girls can help me by not showing her your costumes. How does that sound?

Back to top